Puma's Pup
by callmeGreen-Eyes
Summary: Nothing ever stays the same forever, and while on vacation she accidentally tracks down the one man she never thought she'd see again. Turns out, he was looking for her, too... SECOND PART AFTER PADFOOT AND PUMA
1. Unexpected Encounters

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!! (Yes, finally, I know.) What can I say, school and boyfriends keep me rather busy during the winter. next year might be different, but we'll see. I'm going to try to get as far on this as I can this summer, but I make no promises or guarantees and I warn you right now that the updates will not be regular. I will try though.

You can't really be mad at me, though. At least I'm (finally) writing the sequel instead of fading into non-activity. Besides, I only recently came up with an idea that I actually liked and could come up with an entire plotline for. I've had lots of suggestions, all of which I'm grateful for, but I can see this one working. So, here it finally is folks, the second part to Padfoot and Puma: Puma's Pup.

Disclaimer: I own nothing you recognize, unless of course you read the first one, then I do own a few characters you'll recognize.

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It was our annual visit to England, this time for Rion's twelfth birthday . We went every year in celebration of Rion's birthday, ever since he turned five. The first time was harder than I expected; everywhere we went I was haunted by my previous vacation there and I found it incredibly difficult to keep my thoughts focused on the excited little boy in front of me. However, I _had_ told him to pick any place in the world he wanted as our destination for the trip. He had chosen England. I couldn't very well make a five-year-old pick a different place without any explanation, and I was NOT about to explain things. Not to a five-year-old. He was much too young to bear that knowledge, much too innocent and carefree for me to tell him why England was nothing but a scar on my heart.

For his sixth birthday, he wanted to go again. More than he wanted the toy broom, even. I was nervous still, but it was easier that time. By then I had memories of Rion in those places, instead of ghosts from my past. For Rion's seventh birthday: "Take me to England, mommy!" After that it just became tradition.

This year I had tried to convince Rion I had a bad feeling about going. He knows by now that I have rather strong intuitions, and that they're surprisingly accurate. But he knew I was lying almost before I stopped talking. At twelve years old, he could already see my lies. He is ridiculously smart, just like his father. They could both read me like a book if they wanted to. Luckily, or maybe unluckily, I could never decide, I only had one of them to deal with. Anyway, Rion knew I was worrying about the escaped convict from the previous fall. Some Black fellow, or something. He was the first man to escape Western Europe's wizard prison, apparently. (The news had indeed made it all the way to the states, though far less pronounced. However, I was also subscribed to a European newspaper that had a whole section dedicated to the man. Rion saw my reaction to the article, and that was all he needed to see.)

Rion thought I was irrationally worried that we two tourists (though by now we hardly felt the part) would be the unfortunate ones to encounter him and get killed. Even though he didn't kill that one kid he attacked at Hogwarts. Rob….or, no, Ron… Ron Wesley, or something. But I wasn't worried about that at all. Sirius Black was not a dangerous man, not in the slightest, and definitely not to society. Maybe to one or two men, traitors and the like, but not to society.

He was, however, a danger to me. If I ever saw him again… I don't know what I would do…

Either way, Orion would have nothing of it. "Besides, we have to visit Jess and Tyler," he said to me, as if that settled the matter. Jess and Tyler were old friends of mine—friends of the family by now—that had moved to London not long after our tradition started. After they moved, we extended the vacation in order to visit with them. They also had an extraordinary amount of children, and seemed to have a new one every time we visited. Which was another of Rion's "We Have To Go" points: "Didn't they just have another baby a few months ago? We have to meet it!"

"_Her_," I chastised him, trying very hard to not panic internally. "I think this one is a girl. Amy, I think."

And that was that. We just _had_ to meet Amy, the newest Henderson, the youngest of five—or was it six? Either way, we couldn't _possibly_ skip this year. So, I booked the tickets.

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We did our usual sightseeing. By the fifth trip we weren't sightseeing so much as checking to make sure nothing had changed a lot in a year. There were a few new attractions over the years, but eventually they got integrated into the routine too. It's funny, we had a routine, and yet we never got sick of seeing everything. Nothing ever changes, but it's almost reassuring in a way. He keeps growing and life keeps going, but London's tourist attractions never change.

Once we had spent a few days roaming about England—just like always—we went straight to Jess and Tyler's, spending the rest of vacation in guest rooms that were rapidly becoming storage space or a bedroom for the latest child. There were six kids now, including a set of twins. Sometimes I still forgot who was who, but Rion was pretty good at telling everyone apart and remembering which name belonged to the eldest girl and which one did not. We usually spent about a week with the Hendersons before heading home, and because they lived right near a vast forest, I went running nearly every night. I had had a few slightly dangerous encounters with various creatures (including humans), but by now I knew I could handle pretty much anything the forest could dish out.

I was wild like the forest those nights. I was a cougar, a mountain lion. I was a puma. I was _the_ Puma, to some. At least, when I felt so inclined.

However, I never expected the forest to serve _him_ that second night at Jess and Tyler's.

Originally, I sniffed something vaguely familiar, but it was familiar like déjà vu is—it could be strikingly real, but it was overpoweringly dreamlike. I dismissed it. I had run in these woods many times, and there was always the possibility I was smelling something I hadn't smelt the last few times Rion and I had been in England. It could be anything. Then the scent grew stronger. It was canine…sort of… There was an odd underlay of human male in this strangely familiar scent. It attracted my feline curiousity, and I found myself hunting the odd smell, searching for its source. Eventually I was lead to a bush, were I paused for only a moment. During that pause a giant black dog leapt snarling out at me. I narrowly avoided its teeth, jumping back instinctively and hissing.

My ears perked suddenly. I knew this dog.

He blinked and stopped snarling. He sniffed. He knew me.

We stood staring at each other for a moment before the dog—a shaggy black mutt commonly referred to as Padfoot—transformed into a dirty, malnourished man.

"Rya?" he asked in wonder.

I bolted.

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(a/n) okay i know it's kind of short, but you're just going to have to deal with that. it's only the beginning after all! i'll try to update soon!


	2. Running

thank you to the amazing response from everyone! luckily i got this one done fairly quickly, so this is your reward for all the reviews!!

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I ran as hard as I could, pounding the ground with my paws, trying to leave my panic in the dirt with my paw prints. I paid zero attention to where I was going and eventually skidded to a stop at the bank of a small river. It wasn't a creek or a stream: I would actually have to swim to cross, and while pumas don't have the same extreme aversion to water as a common house cat, I simply didn't feel like fighting the current. It didn't matter to me that the river was only fifteen or twenty feet across, it mattered that while swimming the water controlled my environment, not me. I was panicking still, and obsessively trying to control whatever I could, because that was the only place I felt safe.

So a moment later, I looked overhead. No tree branches stretched far enough to create a bridge for a desperate cat. I was stuck. Because I could not control the river—or maybe because subconsciously I knew I was panicking too much to swim properly—I had hit a dead end. I couldn't run anymore.

I forced myself to breathe slower, opening my mouth in the fashion of an exhausted cat. Slowly, my heart stopped pounding so hard against my chest. I figured I didn't have to worry about my ribcage breaking at the force of it anymore. I inhaled…

…and breathed the scent of a canine, a dog, with that human male underlay! He had followed me!

I very nearly started panicking again, but I forced my brain to focus. I ran in irregular circles, leading my scent in all different directions before finally wading into the water. Not even a bloodhound could follow a scent trail into water. It was ankle deep, and without my fur I probably would have found it chilly. The wind carried his scent past me, and it was much stronger this time. He was closer.

I wouldn't swim, but I could definitely still climb. I jumped onto a branch just within my range, knowing he wouldn't know what to do once my scent disappeared into the river. Assuming, of course, that he followed it that far. I stalked towards the trunk of the tree, back over the bank I had left such odd tracks on. From that branch I could see the entire bank quite clearly, and that was where I waited for him to catch up with me.

You see, I always knew he would catch up to me. Maybe I didn't _know_ I knew, but somewhere deep inside I knew the gods—whomever He or they may be—would not let our past be the end. There was too much left undone, and even more left unsaid. That part of me that knew had been freaking out in anticipation ever since he escaped, waiting for a letter or a sign or _something_. That was why I did not want to go to London this year. This was a can of worms I was most definitely unprepared to open. Rion had insisted, however, and…

Oh, gods. Orion. Sirius doesn't know.

_Please don't let him find me,_ I begged anything that might be listening. _I'm not ready for this. Please…_ If I were human, I probably would have started crying. _I can't handle this yet. I… I still love him…_

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Not long after I made my plea, I heard the padding thump of a medium-sized four-legged creature. So he had followed my trail to its end. Alright. Let's see him get up the tree.

He started sniffing around in circles, obviously confused by the web of scent trails I had left for him. I couldn't stop a small feeling of smug-ness take over my tense body. My…illusion, I guess, had worked. For now. I sat a little straighter. Soon his nose went in the river, and it was half of a second before he realized he was trying to sniff water and pulled his face back, sneezing a very dog-like, head-shaking sneeze. He took a few steps back, eyeing the water curiously. His head was tilted to one side, probably unconsciously, and even from the odd above/side angle I was at the look was adorable. He turned around and started sniffing the ground again.

Eventually the dog spent so much time with his nose to the ground that I started catnapping, and then full out sleeping. Luckily, cats don't have nightmares like humans do, so all I dreamed about was images of a stylized dog and great cat running through the night.

Barking woke me. I was so startled I almost turned human and fell out of the three, but I had trained myself long ago to not transform instinctively. But it wasn't really the barking that startled me. It was the sunshine streaming through the leaves above me and onto the shaggy black dog below me. I had slept the whole night. It was morning. Daytime, even! They'll think something happened to me!

Somehow I figured out which direction the Henderson Household was in, and in one lithe movement (after a quick cat stretch to wake my muscles, of course) I leapt onto the next branch in that direction. I could still hear the dog barking below me, but that changed as soon as he realized I was running again. It was harder for him to follow me this way, with me in the trees and him on the ground, but I was also not used to running full speed in these trees, and that slowed me down. He seemed to be keeping up pretty well, but I was more focused on getting back than getting away.

As the house came into view, I put on an extra burst of speed and ended the chase by landing directly in front of him. He skidded to a stop, nearly sinking into a seated position in the process. His eyes flickered behind me, seeing the house there. He wouldn't dare transform so close to people he did not know, people who might turn him in before he even introduced himself.

I probably wasn't helping his trust of people at the moment, either, but I didn't much care right then. I was glaring at him. No, I didn't hate him. I couldn't hate him, in all honesty. But I was irrationally mad at him and did not want him to follow me into the Hendersons'. He whimpered once, begging me to hear him out. I simply turned away, stalking through the mini field between Jess and Tyler's and the forest. I heard him sit down, huffing as he did so. Once out of earshot, I trotted the short distance up to the porch, where Jess had just emerged.

She opened her mouth and inhaled deeply before noticing me, at which point she abruptly snapped her mouth shut again. My ears twitched forward at the sound of her teeth clicking together. I stared at her expectantly.

"I was just about to call for you," she said in explaination. "Late night?" she added with a touch of amusement.

I grumbled as I padded past her, unable to properly spew profanities with a snout. I transformed just in time to reach for the door, and a mournful howl pierced the quiet morning. I froze.

Jess' hand appeared on my shoulder. "Are you sure you're okay?" she asked gently. "This is the latest you've come back in…well, ever."

I swallowed, hard. "I'm just tired," I said, sounding every bit the part. "Would you watch Orion if I sleep in a bit?" I looked back at her, begging with my eyes.

"Of course Rya. Go to bed."

The last thing I heard before falling asleep was that damned dog, though his howls seemed to be winding down. This time, though, I was human, and humans most definitely have nightmares.

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another chapter, this one longer than the last. i wonder how long the next one will be...


	3. We Will Talk

So I was definitely going to post this like two days ago but Comcast sucks and cut my house off "accidentally" and then work and wonton parties got in the way and, well... this is the first chance I've had. Besides, the review response kinda sucked. Come on guys, you can do better than that! Rockstar and LadyBlue, nice to see you again. Meant to say that before the last chapter and forgot. :), Lakshmi, and Elif, nice to meet you!

By the way, this chapter has a few bad words in it, so... sorry to those of you who don't like cusses. But hey, at least this one's actually a decent size!

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When I opened my eyes, it was almost with a sigh of relief. I had only slept a few hours—I could tell by the temperature in my guest room. If it had been mid-afternoon, I would have been sweating, boiling in the top-floor room. It had to be sometime before noon for me to be as cool as I was, and that meant only a few hours had passed since I lay down. These days I never needed much sleep anyway. Still, what sleep I did get was haunted by rats and talking skulls and snakes and the shadow of a dog. Except, the shadow wasn't just a shadow anymore. The dog was there, I could see him giving me those puppy dog eyes, begging me to help him, to be with him. In every dream I reacted differently, most commonly embracing him.

It scared me how badly I wanted to run outside and scream his name until he came back to me.

But I couldn't. It was just… it was too much. He was the idiot that got himself arrested for his friend's treachery. He was the idiot that didn't take the time to tell anyone the truth. He was the idiot that left me painfully alone for TWELVE YEARS. He was the idiot that got himself so far away I couldn't even tell him he was a father. It was his own damn fault, and I wasn't going to let him back in just so he could fuck up again.

Still, the dreams where I let him come back were so wonderful…

No. I couldn't let him do that to me again. I most definitely couldn't let Orion meet his father, only to have him torn away again.

Finally I convinced myself that running from Sirius had been the right decision last night, though the more my mind silently rebelled against it, the more I realized that I hadn't really _decided_ to run, I just had. I had run instinctively, not decisively.

Which was another argument I used to rule that running was right.

I was so busy arguing with myself that I didn't really process the sounds of the kids playing outside. I heard them, but I didn't hear everything. I just went through the motions of making myself some coffee and then walked out to the front porch. I thought seeing Orion's laughing face would help strengthen my resolve. In a way, I was right. As soon as I saw him my mind shut up. He was so happy. So carefree.

And then I realized it. He was playing with a shaggy black dog. They all were.

_That devil!_

I stood frozen to the porch, unsure of what to do. I had never yelled at Orion for playing with animals before, especially not domestic animals, so I had no reason to now. I had even let him play with strays and wild creatures after laying a few ground rules in my Animagus form (and checking for fleas). I heard Jess laughing to the right of me and my eyes snapped over to her. She was watching the kids playing tag with the dog, who seemed to be having the time of his life.

"You're okay with this?" I said to her, trying to not sound harsh.

She was still surprised by my reaction. "Sure. I freaked a little at first, but Rion showed me how obedient the thing is. I had the kids help me give him a bath, and he's been really good playing with them. Until something happens, which I doubt anything will, I'm okay with it." She looked suspiciously over at me. "Are you not okay with it?"

I opened my mouth several times before coming up with something to say. "Maybe he's deceitful. You know, makes you think he's such a good dog and then, like, attacks your kids?" I was panicking again. _Stop it!_ I yelled at myself.

"Rya. He's a dog. They don't have the brain capacity to plot."

"You'd be surprised," I said, stepping forward.

The sunlight felt good on my face and calmed my nerves a bit. That was when Rion noticed me. He came running over. "Mom! Mom! Can we keep him? I know we never had a pet before but he's really smart! Please, Mom!" he was hugging me tightly around the waist. He had called me Mom. Yelled it, in fact. My eyes locked with the shocked dark eyes of the dog my son wanted to keep so desperately. He was frozen, unmoving, despite the fact that Jess's kids kept running up and hitting him on the shoulders and rump, trying to tag him. I could see the question on his face.

_MOM?_

"Please Mom?" Rion asked again. He made a puppy dog face at me, a ridiculously strong one, just like his father's. I almost started to cry.

"I wish we could, but I don't think it's a good idea honey," I told him.

The dog started walking up to us, slowly and meekly. "But look at how obedient he is!" Rion protested.

Sirius was practically groveling at my feet, begging me to talk to him, let alone keep him. Orion kneeled next to him, making the same damn face. Their eyes were too close to the same color…their begging faces were too strong…

"That's enough, Orion!" I snapped. They both jumped, and a second later Sirius blinked. He looked at Orion, and then at me, and then back at Orion. His jaw opened a bit. "This is not as simple as you think it is!" The kids had all stopped playing, and I heard Tyler started to ask Jess what was going on. She shushed him.

"And YOU!" I said, rounding on the dog. He flinched a little, but didn't move. "I thought I made it perfectly clear this morning that I didn't want you around. Did the fact that I ran away from you _twice_ completely escape you, or was that just me? Was the hissing and glaring not enough? Do I need to spell it out? GO. AWAY. Alright? Now scat!"

I could feel everyone staring at me, but not like I felt his eyes. Everyone else was staring at me because I had completely overreacted, from their points of view. His stare actually said something. It said, "No."

"Mom, he's just—" Rion started.

"No, Rion," I interrupted, looking over at him. I looked him straight in the eye. "You have to understand that this isn't as simple as you think it is." He hesitatingly nodded and backed away a little. I gave the dog my full attention once more.

"Leave, or I will make you leave."

No.

"Don't make me hurt you in front of my son," I said. He eyed me for a moment, taking the time to see I wasn't bluffing. "Leave."

No.

I transformed and lunged all at the same time, but he knew what was coming. The dog jumped half of a second after me, using the ground to hit me and reverse my motion. I heard Orion yelp in surprise and nearly trip backwards. Jess was ordering all the kids into the house. I slammed hard onto the ground, momentarily dazed.

Everything about Sirius said he didn't want to hurt me. But he didn't have to fight me to kill me. He had already done that. Years and years ago. All of my pent up frustration and anger and fear built up in my gut, and before he had time to prepare I launched him into the air with my hind legs. I was up in time to see him roll when he hit the ground, but after he shook his whole body out he seemed just fine.

Honestly, I wanted to kick his ass. I felt like he deserved it. After all the crap he put me through, I felt like he owed it to me. And I was just the girl for the job.

We fought. We fought like cats and dogs, to be perfectly honest. I forgot that my son was probably watching from the windows of the house twenty feet away. I forgot that my friends were most definitely watching, completely confused and unsure what to do. I forgot everything, except fighting with him. His jaw snapped closed on air that used to be my scruff, my claws swiped through air that used to be his shoulder, his paws punched downwards on my head and neck, mine snaked out and kicked his legs out from under him. I could tell I was hurting him more than he was hurting me. I could tell he was just trying to knock me down, maybe even out, but I was determined to make this a real fight. So I kept swiped and biting. If he had been any color but black, his fur would have been stained with blood from small scratches and wounds everywhere. As it was, I had suddenly become the latest puma to sprout red spots.

Suddenly, I was on the ground. My neck hurt, and everything was fuzzy for a moment. Then there was pressure on me. He was on top of me, holding me down with his own body weight. This was dangerous for him to do, since I had already thrown him into the air once from this position. But that time my legs had been positioned much better. That time I hadn't been exhausted.

He half growled half huffed at me, demanding my attention. Somehow, animally, I knew what he was saying to me. "Stop being stupid and talk to me." I didn't move or even react. He growled. "_Now._"

I gently rested one of my front paws on his chest. He was panting heavily, and I could feel his heart pounding against his ribcage. I forced myself to look into his eyes, but his attention was drawn to my neck. Oh, that. I had forgotten that even when I transformed the necklace stayed on me. His nose gently nudged the silver disc on my neck, causing it to flip over. He pulled back, surprised. I rolled over and away, transforming as I did so that I ended up standing a few feet from where I had been originally. Sirius was looking at me with a mixture of confusion and irritation. Everything was deathly silent. I glanced up at the house, where Jess and Tyler were both staring at us.

"Are you okay?" Jess asked. She didn't move.

"Yeah. I…" I looked over at Sirius and sighed. I had to talk to him. If I couldn't beat him when it came down to it, then I definitely couldn't defeat myself. "I'll be back later," I told the two, sounding much more like myself than I had all day.

"Will you?" Tyler asked. It took me a moment to realize they had just seen me battling with the stray dog Jess had practically fallen in love with as if it were a fight to the death. Not only that, but they had watched me surrender.

I gave a small smile. "I will. And he might too," I added, nodding in Sirius' direction. His ears perked and he stood as I turned and walked towards the forest.

"Oh, one more thing," I said suddenly, stopping and turning halfway back to the house. "Orion, you are not coming with!" I yelled, my hands on my hips.

Resignedly, he stood in the grass about twenty feet from where we stood. "But, Mom…" Sirius was still staring at him, disbelieving.

"No. Go back to Jess and Tyler's and stay there."

He huffed and marched back towards the house. I swear that boy is getting more dog characteristics every day. Maybe he is his father's son to the core. It's an interesting thought. I don't think anyone has ever researched inheritance of Animagus forms.

When the porch door slammed shut behind him, I turned back to the shaggy black dog sitting next to me. He looked up at me, as if to say, "Your move."

"You got my attention, all right? Take me to a place you feel safe talking in."

And with that, I followed both my darkest nightmares and brightest dreams--embodied in the same creature--into the woods.

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review review review review!! (though i'm working alot this week and out of town next weekend, i'll try to make it timely!)


	4. Truths

thank you to those of you that reviewed, though i must say i'm kind of disappointed in the numbers. i mean, come on, there's got to be more of you than that. however, special thanks to rockstar, lakshmi, k9cat, and ladyblue. you are the ONLY ONES that reviewed. you all get cookies.

as to the rest of you, GREENEYES LIKES REVIEWS hint hint nudge nudge

now on with the story.

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I followed Padfoot deep into the forest, but it never got dark or frightening. In fact, it was almost frightening how unafraid I really was, walking alone in the woods with the most wanted man in Europe's wizarding world. Unfortunately, bouncing, tail-wagging, obviously ecstatic dogs tend to make one laugh at silliness rather than quiver with fear.

So eventually he lead me to a shadowy crevice in small cliff. We were deep enough in the forest that I had never even seen the rise in land before. He transformed almost immediately upon entering the cave, and the moment I walked in he came towards me exclaiming my name. "Don't," I said, stepping back. He immediately stopped and his arms dropped. He looked hurt. "I'm just… not ready yet, okay? Let's talk first."

"Okay," he said shortly. "About what?" He almost seemed offended, which kind of ticked me off.

I crossed my arms, declining the seat he offered me. "Well I think you owe me an explanation, Sirius."

"_I_ owe _you_ an explanation?" he said angrily. "You've got a kid!"

"So do you, idiot," I countered. He made a "psh!" sound. "Why do you think I named him _Orion Canopus_? Do you think I came up with that on my own, or do you think I named him that because that was what his _father_ would have wanted to name him?" He didn't respond for a long time. Finally, he sat hard on one of the scattered rocks.

"Is he really my son?" he asked desperately.

"He better damn well be because I didn't have sex with anyone else at that time," I responded, still kind of pissed. There was more silence as Sirius absorbed the information. I let him think, because it gave me time to calm down. This was not the time or the place to get into a verbal fight with Sirius.

Finally Sirius looked up at me, completely compliant. "What would you like to know?"

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I was taken aback momentarily, but I tried my hardest to recover. I supposed finding out you have a child _would_ be rather shocking. "Well…" I took a deep breath. "I want to know what happened," I said simply. His head dropped and his movements hardened. "Sirius, what really happened that Halloween? The rumors can't possibly be true, I know you better than that."

He sighed. "What did I tell you in the letters?"

"Nothing," I answered irritably. He gave me a look. I sighed in defeat. "You said Voldemort was going after Lily and James for some reason. You said they were going into hiding and you were the planned Secret-Keeper… but you had a better idea." His body hardened even more, harder than I had ever seen. "Sirius… Peter did it, didn't he?"

"The little _rat_!!" he spat. After several deep breaths, he continued. "I figured there was no way Voldemort would go after Pete. I figured he would never guess James and Lily would make poor pathetic Peter their Secret-Keeper. He would know—just like everyone else—that I was the most likely candidate. So, selfishly, I convinced James to use Peter." He looked up at me, his eyes filled with angry tears. "I convinced him to his death, Rya. I killed them."

My heart softened a little. Now that I knew the truth, everything made more sense. (Which IS what usually happens.) "Peter was a Death Eater, wasn't he Sirius?"

"The coward." I took that to mean yes and had to exercise some serious self-control in order to not say "I _knew_ something was wrong with him!!" Instead I said; "Sirius, did you know he was a Death Eater?"

"Of course not!" he replied indignantly. "I wouldn't just GIVE them to Voldemort!"

"Then you didn't kill them," I said simply.

"Rya, you don't underst—"

"I understand perfectly Sirius. You were betrayed by a good friend, a man you should have been able to trust. You were all betrayed. You were trying to protect Lily and James."

"And instead I killed them." He was determinedly staring at the rock floor.

"Sirius. _Voldemort_ killed them. And then they saved everyone. If you want to get blame-happy, then technically you indirectly saved the entire wizarding world by trying to protect your friends." He looked up at me, a slightly confused look on his face. "Oh, honestly. Do you really think a one-year-old destroyed the most evil wizard of our time by getting hit with the Killing Curse? Please. I guarantee Lily and James had something to do with it, somehow. Didn't you say they were both ridiculously good at magic? I can almost guarantee little Harry isn't the only reason Voldemort got destroyed that night."

It looked like Sirius didn't know what to think. He had obviously never taken the time to actually think about what happened that night, unlike the rest of us. He was too busy blaming himself. I understood where he was coming from, but I had to get him away from those thoughts. They weren't truthful, and they could warp his mind if thought too long. In fact, I was a little worried it had already happened.

"So tell me again what happened?" I asked, hopefully coaxing him away from his self-blame.

"Peter," he said shortly. Mentally, I sighed in relief. "I tried to kill him, Rya," he said suddenly, causing me to freeze in alarm. "I tried to kill Peter. When I heard about James and Lily I… I went crazy. I don't even remember how I found him. I just…" The air was stiff with silence. "I remember him yelling at me for betraying them. I remember being so shocked and angry that I didn't even respond. Then… an explosion. He blew up the street and transformed, making everyone think I destroyed him. I heard they found his finger later." I sat hard on a rock in front of Sirius. _This _was more than I bargained for. I had known there was a confrontation between the two of them, and I knew Pettigrew had supposedly been killed, but somehow I never actually thought about the how and why of the situation. I just automatically assumed he deserved it. "I was laughing when they arrested me. I remember thinking how ironic it was that the one time Peter did something clever on his own was then. We weren't registered Animagi, so no one would look for him as a rat." He spat the last word out. "By yelling what he did, all the blame went to me, especially since we hadn't told anyone Peter was Secret-Keeper. He left a finger behind so everyone would think I blew him up. I was the bad guy."

"That's not clever," I said. The amount of anger in my voice surprised me. "It's cowardice. He's a coward." I paused. "You were in jail for his supposed death, weren't you?"

"Yes, and for James and Lily's."

I was ever so slightly pissed. "You should have killed him. He deserved it. Then at least it would have been worth it."

"Nothing would have made Azkaban worth it, Rya." His voice was suddenly completely hollow. I looked him straight in the face for the first time in minutes: his eyes looked haunted and his skin was pale. I knew better than to let my curiosity ask what it was like.

"Sirius, why didn't you ever write to me?" I asked sorrowfully. I couldn't stop myself. While I had wanted to know what happened all those years ago, I would have been content not knowing if I had at least received a few letters. Though I knew there was a possibility he wasn't allowed to send letters, I still hoped.

He didn't respond right away. In fact, it seemed like it took him a minute to come out of his haunted trance. When he did say something, however, it was very uncomforting. "I don't know." I looked down at the ground, fighting tears. "Why didn't you ever visit?" he asked, just as sorrowfully as I had.

"I wasn't willing to bring my son anywhere _near_ that place," I replied simply. "And he was always with me."

There was a short pause. "Did you really name him Orion Canopus?" he asked hopefully.

"I did."

"And I'm… I mean he's… I'm a dad?"

I let a small smile slide onto my face. "Sirius Black, you are indeed a dad."

"What's he like?" he asked eagerly.

I laughed. "He's like you, actually. He's a troublemaker to everyone but me. He started his first year of magic school last year." Sirius started drilling me with questions after that, on anything from Orion to why I was in London, which of course led me to ask why _he_ was in London, being on the run and all. Apparently he was on his way south, but after quickly summarizing his escape plans he told me about Hogwarts and Harry Potter and Harry's friends Ron and Hermione and a cat he called Ginger but who's name was really something like Crookshank. He told me about the one crazy night in June that involved Harry and his friends and Remus and Peter and someone named Snape and dementors and a hippogriff named Buckbeak (who I would have to meet sometime) and a Whomping Willow. This of course led me to ask about Remus, who apparently had been teaching at Hogwarts last year but resigned after news of his 'condition' escaped into the school.

It wasn't until I saw shades of red and orange streaming onto the rock floor that I realized we had been talking for hours. And because irony would have it no other way, my stomach growled right as I opened my mouth to say something. "I've been out for hours. Everyone's probably worried. I should have gone back hours ago." I stood reluctantly.

"Rya," Sirius said, abruptly standing and taking one of my hands in his own. "I… I have to ask." He took a slow deep breath. "Have you… moved on?" He looked up and into my eyes. I knew what he meant, but somehow I couldn't answer him. I couldn't tell him I had only had three awful dates since he left. I wasn't ready to admit that…well, you know. I just wasn't ready yet, so I avoided it.

I gently pulled my hand away and walked towards the entrance of the cave. "You're going to have to bring me back to Jess and Tyler's," I said. "I don't feel like transforming, and you know that's the only way I'd find my way back." I turned my head and grinned at him. He gave a small smile back. He knew that despite my lack of answer, that didn't necessarily mean my answer wasn't in his favor. Despite twelve years apart, one day together was enough for him to know me at a frighteningly high level. "Besides, you look like you could use a decent meal." I grinned to myself, know what I had just done, and started walking.

"You're letting me stay with you?!" he asked excitedly, running up behind me.

I turned around and stopped him with my palm on his chest. A shock of warmth shot through me, but I ignored it. "I'm _feeding_ you. One thing at a time, Padfoot."

"Nonsense. All or nothing, Little Puma."

With that, he transformed into a very happy, very shaggy black dog and started leaping in front of me. I couldn't stop myself from laughing at him as I followed him. He led me, gleefully, all the way back to Jess and Tyler's.

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for the love of all things rowling REVIEW PEOPLE!!


	5. It's the Stew

thank you for your patience, the last few days have been non-stop craziness and i only got to typing this up last night at practically one in the morning. please forgive any grammar/spelling/word error, i didn't really have time to edit and whatnot.

also, i apologize for the false alarm with the last update which was not a chapter. but, i mean, you gotta give me some credit, i thought i'd get more than three reviews. and of course i did after i chastised you people!

so after this chapter i expect proper reviews. i mean, number of reviewshow fast you get a new chapter...

special thanks go to LadyBlue, Sirius Love, and Thea Wolfe because they are the original three, but thanks also go to Lakshmi, Bec, and humanthesaurus for reviewing. keep it up everybody!!

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Because it was getting late, Jess already had everyone inside. She was probably getting some of her younger kids ready for bed, in fact. The sun had not yet completely set, however, so I knew the older kids (at least) would be awake—Rion included. Because of that, I took the opportunity just outside the house to set some guidelines for Sirius, especially because I knew he couldn't argue with non-muggles so close.

"You're not going to transform, right Sirius?" I said, telling more than asking. "Jess and Tyler are good friends, but not that good. With that whole you supposedly attacking Harry fiasco last year they probably wouldn't want you around their kids, no matter what I said." He nodded in agreement, but I could tell he was thinking of extenuating circumstances when he could break that promise—a.k.a. the times when he could conceivably convince me he just _had_ to transform. "I'm serious, Padfoot," I said, stopping. "No one can know you're you." He looked up at me, almost pleadingly. "Not even Rion." He grumbled unhappily, staring at me for a moment before trudging forward. Obviously he wanted to say something to me, and I had a good idea what it was, too. I didn't want to answer that accusing question, though, because in all honesty I hadn't even told Rion his father's name. All I ever said was that his father was British (you've got to love the accent) and a good man. That was all I felt Rion really needed to know. I mean, it was, wasn't it? Names and histories don't matter, all that matter is what's in your heart, and Sirius was a man of goodness. Regardless of his name, regardless of his past. That was all Orion needed to know at the time.

At least, I hoped names and histories wouldn't matter when he did learn the details. Note the 'when,' not 'if.' I'll tell him someday if he doesn't figure it out on his own, but I doubt it will come down to that. One day he'll ambush me with the information and I'll spend hours trying to convince him of the truth. Oh well.

While I was worried about that distant future day all the way to the front door, Sirius already had his nose in the air and was vigorously wagging his tail. A moment later I could also smell Jess' infamous beef stew. The very scent of it made me smile.

"Hungry, Padfoot?" I asked teasingly. He barked loudly, making me jump, and then his tongue flopped out of his mouth, letting him pant happily. He was practically bouncing, and I could see the smirk in his canine features, the 'Ha I made you jump!' in his eyes. When I laughed instead of immediately opening the door, he barked impatiently.

"Rya?" I heard Tyler call through the screen door.

"Yeah!" I called back. "Our hairy little friend is hungry!" Sirius gave me a look for the 'little' comment (he was rather large for a dog) but barked in agreement regardless. "And so am I!" I could hear the sudden upswing of noise and voices, and then footsteps running down the hall towards me.

"Mom?" Rion nearly slammed through the screen we had just been yelling through.

"Well hi," I responded, taking a step back from the screen. Sirius' rear started thumping me in the thigh because he was wagging his tail so hard. He kept trying to sniff and pant at the same time, causing him to half bite his tongue in a very amusing fashion.

"Jess says you can both come in if you're not 'all covered in forest gunk,'" Rion said. I laughed. "You're not, are you?" He pressed his face against the screen, smooshing his nose. "We just washed him today."

"I promise we are nearly as clean as we were when we left," I said, trying not to laugh at how he looked with his face against the screen like that. "I'll even clean his paws before we come in."

Rion paused for a moment before quickly saying, "Okay," and dashing off.

"Rion!" I yelled, calling him back. I could almost hear him skid to a stop. He was at the door again almost immediately. "Think you can convince Jess to let our poor, starving, furry friend here have some stew?"

He grinned. I hadn't realized before, but Orion's grin was an awful lot like Sirius'. "C'mon, Mom. At least make it a challenge," he said before practically swaggering away.

I smiled down at Sirius, whose non-existent eyebrows were raised. "_Scourgify!_" I muttered, causing Sirius to jump with surprise at the sensation. "Ha!" I said. "I can surprise you too!" He head butted me in response, just hard enough to shove me a foot or two. "Hey!" I said in response. I shoved him back and flung the door open, dashing inside.

The beef stew smell must be getting to me. I am half cat, after all. I just don't normally act this childish.

Yeah. It's the stew.

0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0

Sirius was starting his third bowl of Jess' stew by the time I finished my first one, so I grabbed the last dregs of the liquid before he could even ask for it. There wasn't much left, but I figured he might puke if he ate any more. There was also the additional factor of my continuing hunger. I hadn't eaten all day either, after all.

After dinner Sirius watched as the Hendersons, Rion, and I played a magically modified version of the Muggle game Catch Phrase. It wasn't long until most of us had blue goop stains on our hands (from when the timer goes off and you're still holding the word generator), and as usual, Rion was the only one with perfectly clean hands. He always managed to hold the generator just long enough so that there was no possible way it could land on him when time was up. Sometimes, just to be mean, he would pass it mere moments before it spilled goo, ensuring that the next person—tonight it was Jess and Tyler's second oldest, Becca—had no chance at passing it.

I almost forgot during the course of the game that Sirius was even there, except for the (ever more frequent) times when we would catch each other's eye and just lock onto each other. I could tell he desperately wanted to join in the game. He wanted to sit by me, hold me, and I wanted that too. He wanted to teach Rion how to really screw the people who dared play games with him, and I knew Rion would absolutely love the lesson.

Sometimes, however, life doesn't always let you have what you want. I learned that twelve years ago. Sirius probably did too.

Anyway…

Sometime during the game Orion had got to wondering what we should call the dog. I knew I would get hell for having named him without Rion, but I also know Sirius would love hearing his name come from his son's mouth.

"His name is Padfoot," I said, trying my hardest to keep a straight face.

Rion's jaw dropped and Sirius' eyes popped. I fought against laughing at their faces. "You named him without me?!" Rion asked indignantly.

"He kind of… came with that name. It's hard to explain." Actually it's quite simple: he's an Animagus with his best friend and the two got creative one night and thus the Marauders were born. "But that's his name. Do you like it?"

Rion looked hard at Sirius for a moment. Sirius, for his part, played the dumb dog role perfectly by slightly wagging his tail at the attention. He stared right back at Orion, a goofy grin on his canine features.

"It fits him," Rion finally decided, reminding me of the inexplicable knowledge Sirius once said I had. Apparently Rion inherited that one thing from me. "Come 'ere, Padfoot," Rion said playfully. Sirius leapt at him excitedly and somehow managed to be the first person to get blue goo on his own son.

That devil.

It was hours later before I finally got to bed. Rion won about four times before everyone finally quit, and even then we had to attack our hands with soap (the goo was charmed against _Scourgify_). I was exhausted. Sirius—I mean, _Padfoot_—did not leave Rion's side for the entire game unless he had to pee. Jess had said at some point that Padfoot could stay in the house overnight as long as he slept in the kitchen (tiled floors, I understood and so did Sirius). About twenty minutes after that, during one of our game breaks, I caught Rion hauling half his sheets into the kitchen to make a bed for dear Padfoot. I grabbed a couple pillows from my bed and together we made a super squishy bed for the dog. I convinced Rion to test it and make sure it was _super_ squishy, that way Sirius would recognize the scent as his son's. That way he would know his son was taking care of him.

Neither of us knew Sirius—_Padfoot_—would not use the bed we worked so hard to make perfect for a four-legged, tail-wielding, very furry dog. Instead, after I had as good as passed out in my bed, I vaguely heard him sniffing at my bedside. I was too tired to stop myself from smiling. He gently licked my nose, causing me to squish my face and curl up my body. He took the opportunity to jump on my bed and settle himself at my feet.

I really couldn't complain. It was the first night in years that my sleep wasn't fitful or plagued with nightmares.

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sorry it's kind of short but it's the best i could do under circumstances. it was crazy, we'll just stick with that explanation.

remember folks, number of reviewsspeed of update!!


	6. Just a Dog?

ATTENTION: i'm putting this at the beginning so you guys will read it. between august 21 and september 1 i will pretty much be completely unavailable because of marching band. i'm going to try and get one more chapter up before i go, but i make no promises.

sorry this chapter is kinda short, i was going to add more but i figured you guys would prefer a sooner update rather than a longer update.

on that note, the number of reviews sucked again. thanks to bed, serenitynosong, and padme, the only people to review last chapter. you guys rock! everyone else failed.

onward!

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The next day went ridiculously well for the most part. By the time I was awake enough to realize Padfoot had slept with me and start panicking, he was already gone. I slowly ambled down to the kitchen, where I found Jess happily feeding her younger children. Sirius thumped his tail as I walked in the door, looking for all the world as if he had been laying in his makeshift bed for hours—all night, even.

"Rya! You're up early!" Jess said to me. Merlin, she is _such_ a morning person. "Did you sleep well?"

I eyed Sirius. His eyes were dancing. "Well enough," I replied evasively. Padfoot panted, but I could tell he was laughing on the inside.

"He stayed in here all night, I think!" Jess said, surprised, after following my gaze. "He didn't even pee on the floor!"

I laughed. Sirius would have to be—pardon the pun—_piss drunk_ to pee on the floor. Jess's ignorance was hilarious. Sirius probably just followed his nose to the nearest toilet, stood on his hind legs, and peed like any normal human-dog would. Not that he is normal…

"Are you sure about that, Jess?" I asked playfully. "I've heard that some dogs eat their own excrement…" She froze. I had to stop myself from giggling at her. When I arrived back in the kitchen an hour later, Padfoot was outside with the kids and Jess was furiously mopping the floor.

I sat on the porch relaxing for the entire afternoon. Lunch was had on the lawn, as well as the mid-afternoon celebratory drinks. We weren't really celebrating anything specific, just vacations and friends and good times and good days. I couldn't help silently toasting to reunions, as well. Dinner was eventually eaten outside as well, but this time we ate at a conjured table (or two) instead of off blankets in the grass. The porch was just big enough for both families to sit at the table, so Padfoot ended up laying under the table at my feet. Of course, he got plenty of morsels of non-dog food with his puppy eyes. After dinner games were brought out, but eventually most of Jess' kids had to be put to bed. Padfoot took advantage of the empty chairs and snatched a seat for himself. It was after Jess got back that things went downhill.

Somehow, the past got brought up and things got awkward. I stood and left when the conversation turned towards my past prior to knowing Jess and Tyler—I didn't need to talk about Sirius or anything involving him in front of him. He obviously wanted to hear it, though, because he merely looked at me when I walked in the house. I made my way slowly back to the porch with another bottle of my favorite (basically non-alcoholic) alcoholic drink, arriving about five minutes later when I thought it would be safe. Let's just say I was very wrong.

"Jess, did you know my dad?" Rion asked from outside. I could hear them talking through the living room window, and his question froze me in the unlit room.

"No, I didn't meet your mom until a few years later, after you were born," Jess replied, her voice a touch…bitter? From the sound of things, the other kids had gone to bed while I was hiding in the kitchen and Jess was starting to clean up.

"Did mom ever talk about him?" Orion asked, sounding a little pathetic. His voice was…moody? Or was it hopeful? I couldn't tell.

"No," she said shortly. "She never told me much, except that she loved him and he was a good man." She made a 'psh!' sound, causing me to silently recoil in shock and surprise. _What does _that_ mean?_ I thought. "I won't lie to you Orion," she continued, "I find it hard to believe her when she says that. He was a 'good man,' and yet he ditched her the moment she got pregnant and never contacted her again? Good man my a—"

Angry growling cut her off. _Shit._ Sirius was still out there. "Padfoot, what's wrong?" I heard Rion say. The growl faltered for a moment when Rion called him by name, but he continued growling even louder after. I dashed outside, trying to make it look like I hadn't been listening and wasn't diving in before the dog attacked. Sirius was standing on his chair growling angrily at Jess, who looked both frightened and confused.

"What's going on?" I asked, my voice a little higher than usual.

"I don't know!" Orion answered. Jess was still looking at Sirius suspiciously. "I was just…" He trailed off, letting Sirius' growls take over once more. I looked at Rion, telling him without words to finish his sentence. He looked down. "I was just asking Jess about dad…"

It got much quieter after Rion finished his sentence. Sirius had stopped growling and instead was looking curiously at Rion. He was making the 'intrigued dog' face, with his ears perked and his head slightly cocked to the side.

I tried not to giggle at him.

"Don't worry about your Father, Orion," I said soothingly. "Someday you'll know everything." I could feel that day hurtling towards me even as I spoke, especially with Sirius practically begging me to let him transform. I kissed him on the forehead, despite Rion cringing away from me like a typical twelve-year-old boy. "Go get ready for bed, Rion. It's getting late."

"As long as you don't kiss me again," he whined, wiping away at his forehead.

I laughed. "Deal." He walked in the house and left a rather tense atmosphere behind him. Make that a _really_ tense atmosphere.

"That dog is _not_ normal," Jess said accusingly.

"So?" I responded, not bothering to deny it.

"So, what if he's dangerous?"

"Jess, I can guarantee you he's not dangerous."

"Yeah, after that lovely romp on my lawn yesterday, I so believe you." She had a point. "Wait, weren't you bleeding then? What happened to all your cuts?" I lifted my shirt hem a bit and showed her a nice, long scab.

"None of them were worth wasting energy on healing." Which was true, but really I had forgotten about them the moment I saw Sirius. Speaking of Sirius, I tried to hold back a smirk when I noticed him staring at the small amount of skin I was showing. Horny bastard. "Look, that 'lovely romp,' as you called it, was just a misunderstanding. I _promise_ he's not dangerous."

She walked into the house without responding. I got the distinct impression she still didn't believe me.

0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0

I hugged Sirius before we went inside, for no other reason then I felt like it. Of course, the moment I did it I felt extremely awkward and practically ran into the house. Once inside, I took a side trip to the bathroom, arriving in the hallway at the same time as Orion. I offered to conjure him some ice cream before forcing him into bed, since he was the only kid still up. We walked in the kitchen together, right as Jess pointed her wand at Sirius' turned back. She was facing partially away from the door and therefore hadn't seen us walk in, but somehow I still recognized her wand movement as a recognition spell. Instinctively I threw a shield charm in front of Sirius. My reaction was more one of alarm than anything, however, and the power in my shield shattering the big porcelain bowl we had been eating chips out of all night.

"What were you _doing_?" Rion shouted at Jess. "He's just a _dog_!" He ran over to check on Padfoot, who had whipped around at the sound of my incantation and started growling again the moment the bowl shattered. "Why are you trying to hurt him?"

"I wasn't going to _hurt_ him," Jess said defensively. "I was just going to make him reveal his secrets…"

"He's a DOG," Rion replied in a quit-being-stupid voice.

"Orion," I said, commanding his attention. He turned his head so one of his ears was properly trained on me but would not look at me. "She wasn't trying to hurt him."

He finally looked at me, but his eyes were laced with confusion. "Then why did you put a shield over him?" he asked accusingly. I was slightly shocked, simply because he had never used such an angry, upsetting tone with me before.

"Yes, Rya, why did you shield a _dog_ from such a spell?" Jess added, much more angry now. "If he's just a dog, it wouldn't have done anything. He would have barely even felt it. If he's just a dog, _why_ does he care so much about my opinion of Orion's father?" I didn't answer right away, letting her finish despite her pause. Instead I reached out and placed my hand on Padfoot's head, immediately quieting him. "And tell me, Rya," Jess went on, angrily vanishing the shattered bowl. "How is a _dog_ so fond of you, a _cat_?"

I sighed wearily as I kneeled down to scratch behind Padfoot's ear. His tail thumped very slowly against the floor, but his gaze kept flashing over to Jess warily. "Everyone has their secrets, Jess," I said quietly, "and as long as those secrets are harmless, _no one_ has the right to force them out." I looked pointedly at her.

"How can we possibly know if the secret is harmless, Rya?" Jess asked, her voice slightly less angry and slightly more…worried.

"You just have to trust those who know," I replied, continuing to look right at her.

She sighed. "I do trust you Rya, it's just… If it's harmless, why does it need to be a secret?"

I smiled, but it felt empty. "Trust me."

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REVIEW PEOPLE. or no update for like TWO WEEKS.


	7. Run with Me

I am SO sorry!! this should have been up ages ago and i am well aware and i suck so bad i know!! but really it's not entirely my fault. my computer crashed two days before i went to camp, which meant there was no way i could possibly update before hand, especially since ALL of my documents got deleted in the process, and i did warn you all that i couldn't update during camp. and school of course started this week and my sched has been really crazy and i've given up homework time to type this up so you better be grateful!

i, however, am VERY grateful to the following people: Bec, serenitynasong, Padme4000, humanthesaurus, Elif, Lady Blue, Seanymph, and Asa-Hoshi. you guys all get your own e-cakes for reviewing and reminding me just how quickly i needed to type.

now, one last thing. i make NO GUARANTEES about when i will be able to update. i can promise you right now i will do so whenever i can (at the very least once a month), but from here on out school comes first. unfortunately, band, calc, bio, and norwegian are going to collectively rape me time-wise this semester. but i will make an effort to get a new chap up at least once a month.

on with the long (and patiently) awaited chapter!!

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"Mom?" Rion asked later as I dropped him off at his room. Well, I wasn't really 'dropping him off.' His room was on the way to my room, and we were both going to bed. But I turned back towards him despite the call of my bed from a few doors down. "You know what you said earlier to Jess, about secrets?" He was shifting uncomfortably as I nodded, trying to hide my confusion. He looked down at the floor then. "I was just wondering if…um…if you would tell me your…um…your secret."

I was a bit shocked, I won't lie, but I couldn't say I hadn't seen it coming. I think unconsciously I had been preparing for it, actually, simply because I knew without even thinking about it that I was about to tell Orion the most important part of my secret. Now was as good a time as any, after all, and if Sirius went against orders and transformed (which I had a very strong suspicion he would one of these days. He wasn't exactly a follower of the rules…) it was be a bit easier to explain with two confirmations than it would be with one.

Padfoot had, of course, followed us upstairs. I knew I couldn't really fudge anything up to make either of us look better. As narcissistic as he always had seemed, he was only arrogant because everything he boasted about was true. He never lied to make himself look better, and he would not let me do it either. Plus, I knew telling Orion right off the bat would surprise Sirius, and I was always a fan of that.

"Alright," I said, trying and failing to suppress a grin when I saw Rion's face light up. Clearly he had expected me to chastise him. "Let's go in your room, then we'll talk," I continued. Sirius looked up at me in confusion and alarm for a moment before amusement took over his features. Rion eagerly opened the door and dashed in his room, practically leaping on the bed. Sirius and I followed more slowly, taking time to shut the door behind us.

In the mere seconds it took me to sit next to Rion, I was nervous. I might have been unconsciously preparing for this, but I was _not_ ready. I really didn't even know how he would react. "My secret," I started, staring down at my knees. I had to take a deep breath before I could continue. "My secret…is your father." The air in the room immediately stilled, though Orion showed very little surprise at my announcement. He had probably expected that. Oh well. He was, however, moving very little and breathing very slowly, as if afraid the smallest sound would deafen any information I might give him. "What I'm about to tell you mustn't be repeated to anyone, do you understand?" He nodded fervently. "You can't tell any of your friends, not even Andy, and you most definitely cannot tell _any_ of the Hendersons." He nodded again, more solemn this time but still very attentive. "Your father's name," I started again, having to take another deep breath, "is Sirius Black."

Orion's face went blank for a moment before he looked down. Sirius was looking eagerly between the two of us, waiting for a reaction, an action, _something_ to happen. That's when I noticed Rion slowly gripping the sheets on his bed. "Rion?" I asked tentatively. He didn't respond, except to look at a different patch of carpet. Padfoot tried to use his doggy wiles to get Rion's attention, but he was completely ignored. Suddenly a thought occurred to me. "You've been reading my British newspapers, haven't you?"

"Maybe," he muttered after a moment or two. "But just the _Daily Prophet_…"

I sighed inwardly. I knew that subscription was going to bite me in the ass one day. I never even actually read the damn thing.

"Orion, that newspaper is about as reliable as a stubborn donkey. The man described is not your father." He looked up at me hopefully. "The man described by the _Prophet_ doesn't exist. Sirius is nothing like that—he isn't a monster or a murderer."

Rion's face darkened again. "How could you know that Mom?" he asked me angrily. "Maybe he wasn't when you knew him but if you hadn't noticed that was twelve years ago. He hasn't even tried to contact you since I came around!"

The truth of his words stung a little, but he didn't need to know that truth. "Are you sure about that?" I said slyly, raising an eyebrow at him. He stared at me wide-eyed for a moment before I stood to leave. "C'mon, Padfoot," I said the dog silently applauding me with his tail. I could see him laughing too, even though no sound came out. "Let's let you out before bed." I opened the door and let Sirius leave first, but he just had to bark at Rion first, causing him to jump. "Good night, Orion," I said to my—our—son.

"'Night Mom," he responded dazedly. I left the room with a grin, following a frolicky Sirius back down the hallway. For some reason that little conversation had given me new energy, and I was no longer feeling the need to plop into bed and never get up. I could feel the weight of that secret being lifted from my shoulders. It had been so difficult to keep that from him for so long. Telling Orion…. Well, let's just say I should have done it a long time ago. Before the mess at Hogwarts happened. But then again, if I had told Orion earlier I wouldn't have known for sure that Sirius was innocent. I had to hear it from him, hear his side of the story, to really _know_ I was right.

Sirius. You know, for being an escaped convict accused of the murder of his brother-like best friend, he sure was a happy dog. I followed him out to the porch, taking a deep breath of the invigorating night air. Sirius flopped and rolled on the grass as I felt my inner self trying to stretch in my constrictive body. I walked out onto the cold grass of the lawn and noticed for the first time that Sirius was staring at me rather expectantly. I took another hesitant step forward, recognizing the glint in those beautiful dark eyes of his. Sure enough, I regretted that step the moment my weight shifted onto my front foot and Sirius jumped at me playfully. Though I'm a little ashamed to admit it, I yelped in alarm and surprise.

The next thing I knew, there was a shaggy black dog licking every inch of my face. "Knock it off, Padfoot!" I said, trying not to laugh. He continued slobbering all over me, causing me to accidentally blurt out, "Sirius, you prat!" The effect was instantaneous. He was staring at me again, watching me wipe his slobber off my face. I felt even more liberated. Saying his name always felt so right…

I couldn't stop smiling as I finished wiping off my face, and once I was done I sighed, unintentionally inhaling more intoxicating night air. Puma started to take control, and I wanted nothing more than to run through these woods with this mangy mutt, just like we did all those years ago in the forest by Lily and James' place.

"Run with me," I whispered breathlessly to him. The very idea of it was making me antsy, and inside I could feel myself getting impatient. "Run with me, Padfoot," I said again. Very slowly, he stepped to the side and off of me. I transformed as I rolled in the opposite direction, causing me to 'land' on all fours as a puma. I shook my fur, and for some reason felt extremely happy to be an animal once more.

So I smiled. It would probably look like a snarl, a threat to a human, but Padfoot understood easily and smiled right back. My tail twitched and we darted off into the forest.

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After several hours of chasing each other and racing each other and wrestling each other and basically just never stopping, Sirius and I finally wandered back to the slight clearing of what I was starting to call his cave. For the first time I smelled something… equine-esque. But at the same time it smelled of… feathers? I started following the scent, curious, and Sirius simply followed me, as if he either didn't care or already knew what it was my nose had caught. Eventually I looked up and discovered myself in the presence of a hippogriff.

I froze roughly ten feet from the beast. It was eating what looked like a dead weasel. I had only ever seen a hippogriff once in my life, but that was from a distance and in a classroom setting. I had never approached one before, and I had zero intention on changing that.

"His name's Buckbeak," came his beautiful voice behind me. Damn my more finely tuned ears in this form. I vaguely noticed the hippogriff lifting its head towards the noise, but I was too busy turning to yell at Sirius for not warning me to think about it.

He was leaning against a nearby tree, smirking slightly, and looking noticeably better than the last time I had seen him. He was healthier, yes, but happier too. Apparently, survival for the soul of notorious Sirius Black really only requires hearty meals.

"Sirius," I said, barely transforming in time to say the words in English. "You could have given me a little warning."

I heard crunching leaves and whipped back around, seeing the hippogriff only a few feet away now, looking blankly between Sirius and I. "His name is Buckbeak," Sirius repeated. The beast stared at Sirius for a moment after hearing its name, and then the strangest thing happened: it bowed. Then it looked right at me. "Rya, I need you to listen closely. Look him straight in the eye and don't blink too much. They don't trust rapid blinkers for some reason." My eyes immediately started watering. "Now, very slowly, bow to him." I did as told, bowing lower than I ever had in my life, forcing myself to keep eye contact with the hippogriff. It was only a second before this creature bowed to me. It—he—could kill me effortlessly, but instead it was bowing to me. How incredible.

"You should pet his beak," Sirius interjected. "He likes that."

"What?!" I said in alarm, forcing myself to _not_ jump away from such a noble creature. I could remember my old Magical Beings teacher telling us how easily offended hippogriffs were, and I had a feeling that leaping back in possible revulsion would be a bit offensive.

"C'mon, you're not afraid, are you?" Sirius teased as I slowly stood straight again.

"No," I said stubbornly, trying to keep my voice calm. Buckbeak tossed his head and I had to instinctively stop myself from the unconscious flinch.

Suddenly I could feel warmth at my back. I slightly turned my head, but I didn't have to smell his scent to know it was him. His left hand slid around my waist while his right found mine. The world melted away, and nothing was left but this clearing with Buckbeak and Sirius and I.

"Trust me," he whispered into my ear. I felt myself tremble momentarily.

"That's the problem," I responded quietly, causing him to hesitate. "I do trust you," I finished. I could feel him smile into my hair.

"Go towards him," he said to me, still speaking into my ear, as if I was the only one meant to ever hear his voice. I gazed in fearful respect at Buckbeak as I took one hesitant step after another. "Good," I heard him mutter a few times, despite the fact that I kept crushing his left hand every time Buckbeak moved quickly (which was a lot). At some point Sirius had lifted our right hands to eye level, and before I knew it Sirius was guiding rather than holding my hand, and I was within a foot of Buckbeak's beak…and then Buckbeak leaned forward into my open palm, letting me stroke his ridiculously smooth beak.

My fear drained away as Buckbeak closed his eyes and rubbed gently against my hand, rather like a cat does when it thinks it's not being pet enough. "Hey, Buckbeak," I said softly and without thinking. "I'm Rya," I continued. "It's nice to meet you." He rubbed his beak along this inside of my arm, letting me feel how ridiculously soft his feathers were.

"Want to go for a ride?" Sirius asked me suddenly. I could hear him smiling again.

"You can't possibly still have that Harley of yours, Sirius," I replied, still staring at and petting Buckbeak. I wasn't really thinking. I was in awe of how…not wild Buckbeak was. Mostly though, I was wallowing in how good it felt to be near Sirius, to hear him, to feel him, to even be able to say his name frequently.

"Nah," Sirius responded. "Hagrid probably still has it. Or he better, at least." I giggled. "No, the ride I'm thinking of involves more natural flight." He was smirking now. _Natural flight?_ I thought. _How could we possibly…oh gods._ My eyes had landed on Buckbeak's rather enormous wings.

"No way, Sirius—" I started.

"Buckbeak," he interrupted, "you wouldn't mind giving your new friend and I a ride, would you?" I stared at him incredulously for a moment before looking to Buckbeak for his answer. He raised his head for a moment, as if thinking, before shaking it, very clearly stating that he would not mind.

"Sirius, I am _not_ okay with this. _Not._ I don't fly. Cat, remember?" I said, pointing to myself. "Cats don't fly, they leap—"

"Shh," Sirius said, cutting me off again. That was getting annoying. He cupped my cheek, trying to be comforting, but I could tell he was humoring me. "I'll be with you."

So I went.

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i forgot to mention that in my rush to get this uploaded for you guys, i did absolutely zero editing. again. my bad. but if you see something blatantly wrong (even if it's just an effed up comma or something) please tell me. i don't like looking like a tool.

review please, but don't feel rushed. number of reviews is no longer proportional to how fast i update.

oh college, it so gets in the way of more important things. ;D


	8. Corny LakeSide Scene

okay, here is the update! (finally!) for the record, most of you fail at reviews this time, especially considering you had almost a whole MONTH to do it. however, i do recognize that it was the first month of school and therefor will give you all some leniency this time.

next time, there will be negative cookies handed out.

however, those who get cookies this time include tear-of-the-night, humanthesaurus, and ladyblue. and two for seanymph, now that she has finally caught up. ;)

DONT GET NEGATIVE COOKIES!

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I won't lie, I was terrified by the mere thought of riding such a massive creature. Buckbeak seemed to know I was uncomfortable, though, because I could tell he was trying to make the ride as smooth as possible. Sirius was sitting behind me, holding the reigns with me. I was really only holding them because I needed something to grip onto, so he was steering, his hands moving my hands oh the chain. He took us all the way up to cloud level, though there were very few clouds. It felt like if I had the nerve to let go, I could simply reach my hand up and glide it among the stars.

However, being at that height did start to get chilly eventually, so I semi-consciously cuddled against Sirius in order to steal some of his warmth. He used one hand to squeeze me in a hug while the other turned Buckbeak into a gentle downward spiral. Of his own accord, Buckbeak landed us near a small pond. It was a watering hole, really. The thing was much too small to be a lake, and much too clear to be a pond. Once Sirius and I had dismounted, the hippogriff went straight towards the water. Apparently we had been flying just a little too long.

It was only after Buckbeak had half-waded into the water that I realized I was still in Sirius' arms. I had insisted I could get down by myself, and then proceeded to lose my balance upon hitting the ground and fall into Sirius' waiting arms. I looked up at him and caught him staring at me. I couldn't stop myself from staring back. He was so handsome…especially when he smirked like that.

_Wait_, I thought suspiciously,_ why is he smirking?_

But then the smirk faded and he was staring at me with such an intensity that I was forced to look away. He raised his hand and brushed it against my cheek before cupping my face and forcing me to look at him, except that my eyes were closed with the pleasure of his touch.

"I've missed you so much, Rya," he whispered to me. He was so much closer now. I could practically feel his heart pounding in his chest… Or was that mine?

"I know," I responded, unable to say I had missed him too.

"Rya, stop worrying about what it means if you say something, or what the consequences may or may not be," he said forcefully. My eyes opened finally, but I did not yet look at him. "If you want to say something, say it."

I hesitated for a moment before looking up and into his eyes. They were still so intense I could feel it. It was as if he were seeing my soul, not my body. "I've missed you too, Sirius."

"I know."

Very slowly he lowered his lips to mine, so slowly it was almost painful, and yet I couldn't move well enough to speed up the process. In fact, I was hardly breathing. The moment our lips touched, however… It was as if the last twelve years had never happened, as if suddenly there was this whole world of possibilities where Sirius and I had stayed together and gotten married, where everything hadn't fallen apart on Halloween. There was even a world where those things could still happen, where we could be a real couple, a real family even.

I almost collapsed when he let me go, but his arms were so tightly wrapped around my waist that it was impossible for me to slide more than a couple inches down. My breathing was irregular. The power of his kisses…it's difficult to explain. Let's just go with they're powerful.

But then I noticed his breath was shaky as well. Not even a second after I was supporting my own weight, Sirius' hand shot back up to my face, slamming my lips onto his with such a hunger I had never seen or felt. I didn't even realize that I had jumped a little at the same moment, throwing my arms around his neck and forcing his face closer to mine. Proximity and touch were more important than anything right now. My hair was messy enough from the flight, but his hands got tangled in it anyway. It wasn't long until I was tugging at his shirt, making us stop kissing for the half of a second it would take to pull it over his head. I wanted to touch his skin, to feel the warmth come from its source. I wanted to feel his heart beating beneath my own hand, to know this was real and not some torturous dream. It wasn't until a breeze blew against my own topless body that I realized what we were about to do.

"Sirius," I panted. I had to lean back in order to stop us from kissing each other, but even that didn't last long. Soon I was against a tree, my legs wrapped around his waist and my back scraping against the bark. "Sirius, wait, stop," I whispered between breaths. He slowed down but still did not stop leaving marks on my neck and shoulders. "We…I…" I tried to put coherent thoughts in my head before forming coherent sentences, but the feel of his mouth on my skin was doing an excellent job of distracting me from both.

"You're thinking again," he muttered against my skin, as if he was having no problems with talking.

"I…yes…" He growled a little, and I could feel myself get wet. Wetter? I had no idea.

"Do you love me?" he asked aggressively, looking at me for the first time since we kissed. I was too busy trying to breath regularly to answer. "Rya!" he yelled. My vision cleared a little and I could see emotions raging on his face. He wasn't angry, he was demanding what he knew I wanted to give. He was hungry and desperate for me. He—like I—had been away from the person he loved most for far too long, and now was when he meant to make up for that lost time. "Do you love me?" he demanded again. He had to hear it.

"Yes, Sirius," I replied finally. I kissed him, softly at first, before it became rough and hungry again. "I love you so much…" I added as he lifted me away from the tree by my butt and carried me towards the soft grass by the shoreline.

He dropped onto his knees, taking me with him and causing me to squeak. He was holding me as close to him as he could, staring at me desperately. "Are you still in love with me?" he asked, sounding much more docile. "After all these years, are you still in love?"

There was a difference between 'love' and 'in love,' and Sirius believed that 'in love' was reserved for the one person you were meant to be with forever. I was fully aware of this fact when I answered without hesitation, "Sirius, I have never been more in love than I am right at this very moment." I paused just long enough to smile at him. "Even after all these years."

Gently he laid me down in the grass, lowering himself on top of me. The only comfortable position for me to lie in was with my legs wrapped around his waist still, so that's where they stayed. His hands were touching me everywhere, sliding over every inch of skin already exposed, and it felt as if he were touching me in the most sensitive places in my body. Sure, I had had a few one-night stands and flings over the years. It's not like I cut myself off from sex when Sirius was taken from me. But none of those guys touched me like he did, like it was instinctive and important. I couldn't even remember Sirius touching me like this before, but that had been twelve years ago. Twelve long, lonely years. Hell, by now it was important that he keep touching me.

"I still love you, Rya," Sirius whispered to me. He was on all fours above me, staring down at me. His face looked so…confused, and even a little pained. "I've loved you this whole time."

"Really?" I asked childishly, even though I knew in my heart there was no way he could be lying. My hand brushed against his face.

"You're part of the reason I didn't go insane…" he started. He didn't have to finish. I knew when and where he would have gone insane. I had heard about Azkaban's reputation. I nodded to show I understood. "There was truth, which was what really happened that Halloween. I knew I was innocent, I knew Peter was alive and guilty, and none of those were happy thoughts. Dementors can't suck it out of you if it's not happy. There was also you. You were a happy thought, a hope, and after awhile I couldn't really remember you, or us." My eyes tried to water at this information, but I forced the tears back. Sirius was not responsible for his temporary memory loss. "But you were also a truth, I think." His eyes dropped. "I don't know, it's hard to explain." He looked up at me again. "Still, whenever I was so lonely I thought I might actually go insane, I just thought about you. Sometimes I'd sit there for hours just saying your name, even if I couldn't picture your face. You were… you were real, somehow, and I guess the Dementors couldn't get to that."

Alright, I was crying. A little. Just hearing what he had to say…I couldn't help but feel overwhelmed with love. Saying my name kept him from insanity? The power of love is inspiring and surprising, apparently.

"I love you Sirius Black," was the only response I could think of.

"I love you too, Rya Northen," he replied. He kissed me, softly at first but then hard and hungry again. Every time we touched the energy of it intensified. I'm not sure how we did it, but both of us lost our pants without leaving the ground.

We made love, right there on that grass by that watering hole. For the first time in twelve years, we were becoming whole again. I have no idea where Buckbeak was during it all, but he stayed away and didn't bother us until long after we were done. In fact, it was probably at least a few hours later when we started falling asleep that Buckbeak came over and nudged me, leaving a small scrape on my back. It hurt more than I expected, but I knew him well enough by then to know it was unintentional. I, in turn, had to nudge Sirius and make him aware of the situation. Obviously Buckbeak was trying to say something, but I didn't know him _that_ well yet.

"Sirius, you prat, wake up," I finally said, shaking him harder the longer it took. He groaned in response. "Wake up," I said again. He opened one eye and glared at me. "Your pet is nudging me with a rather sharp beak. Care to find out why?"

He looked up at Buckbeak, who was still standing behind me, and said "What?" in a rather harsh tone of voice. Buckbeak reared his head back up, glaring at Sirius. I probably would have been offended too if someone talked to me like that!

"Sirius, hippogriff, remember?" I muttered. "Don't talk down to him."

Buckbeak looked carefully through one eye at me but refused to move. Sirius sighed and pushed himself up on one elbow. "I'm sorry Buckbeak. You know how I get after waking up. Friends?" He held up his right hand, rather like a muggle biker signaling a turn. It made no sense to me in this situation, until Buckbeak lifted his right wing in a similar fashion. They had their own code, their own signals! It was like a secret handshake! "Brilliant. So what's up, buddy?"

Buckbeak tossed his head enthusiastically towards the sky and flapped his wings a few times. While I was busy watching the talons on his front feet bounce erratically off the ground, Sirius actually followed Buckbeak's gaze. "It's nearly morning…? Oh, shit! Rya, we have to go!"

It took me a moment to understand why the fact of morning would instill such a rush in him. Of course, the last time I was gone all night Jess was still looking for me when I got back. I'm with people this time; I can't just go off disappearing! I jolted up from the grass shortly after he did and went looking for my clothes. It wasn't until I had my pants nearly buttoned that I noticed Sirius watching me, still shirtless himself.

"What?" I said, blushing a little.

He shook his head. "Nothing." He bent over to grab his shirt and tossed me mine. "I'm just always awed by how beautiful you are."

I rolled my eyes. "You haven't changed one bit, Sirius Black," I told him.

"And aren't you so grateful?" he responded playfully, sneaking one arm around my waist.

"Maybe a little," I muttered, kissing him quickly before dashing off to bow to Buckbeak. His response time was much faster today, and within minutes I was climbing aboard again.

(And by "climbing aboard" I mean "being helped up by Sirius…again…")

The sun had just started rising by the time we were in the air again. It was probably the most beautiful sunrise I have ever seen in my life: in the air on a lovably deadly animal with his arms wrapped around me. I wished it would never end.

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for the love of all things people, PLEASE REVIEW. i actually FORGOT about this story for a week because it had been so long since anyone had reviewed or i had had time to think about it. i PROMISE reviews will help motivate me. otherwise, it might be freaking thanksgiving before you see an update, and neither of us want that. okay? okay. it only takes a word to review (though i wouldn't mind a few more than one).

YAY UPDATE!


	9. Not Anymore

i am barely making this on time and i know it. sorry guys. it's been a ridiculously crazy month and, well, school comes first. hell, yesterday was the first day i was even able to work this month because of school and band combined eating every bloody weekend this month. ah, well. i'm still getting it done before december, and that's my goal. yay me!

christmas (or holiday, i suppose) cookies go to the following people: PadfootCc, k9cat, humanthesaurus (you're special too!), SeaNymph, The Singer in White, Mariah, LadyBlue, and Winni3 for the reviews. You guys kept them coming throughout the month, reminding me that eventually i had a chapter to write. and i won't lie, i had a lot of fun writing this chapter. mainly because i didn't even plan on the crap that goes down. mwahahahaha!

on with the story (finally)!!!!

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By the time we landed the sun had fully risen, and so had Jess. I could hear her calling my name all the way from the small clearing we landed in. Poor Buckbeak; in Sirius' attempt to get me as close to the house as possible without getting caught, we landed in a rather small clearing not even big enough for Buckbeak's full wingspan. I heard several branches crack right before we thudded to the ground. Once we hit the ground, however, I was far more focused on not falling off until I was supposed to.

"You alright?" Sirius asked me as he helped me down. My hands _were_ shaking a little, but I didn't think it was _that_ noticeable. "You look a little…shaken."

"I'm fine," I said, but it came out far more like a quiet whisper than I intended. I cleared my throat and repeated myself, adding, "I just don't enjoy steep and sudden landings as much as you do, apparently." He grinned. Prat.

Jess called to me again. Louder and more worried this time. "I need to go," I said, already starting to pull away towards the house. "Will you meet me there once you've taken care of him?" I asked, gesturing towards Buckbeak.

Sirius grabbed my hand, pulling me sharply into his arms and another one of those earth-shattering kisses. I forgot everything again, everything except the feel of his lips, his hands, his body against mine. After what seemed like an eternity, and yet barely a second, the kiss ended and my eyes were able to open—though all they could see were Sirius' intensely dark orbs staring right back. "I love you," he said simply.

"I love you too," I replied. The world was just now coming back to me. I heard movement in a bush to our right, but thought nothing of it. We were in a forest after all. It's probably just a squirrel or something. While fun to chase, they don't quite measure up to the handsome man before me.

"Mom?"

I whipped around, trying to stand in front of—and thereby hide/shield—a man both taller and larger than myself. My heart was pounding, and for the first time in my life I really truly did NOT know what to do. No part of me had prepared for this. "Orion, what are you doing out here?" I said, hoping against hope that Sirius had transformed while I turned.

"Jess kind of freaked out about not knowing where you were again and it woke me up, so I came out to help find you." He was staring curiously behind me. A girl would never do what I did in any other situation: I tried to look as big as I possibly could. Man or dog, Orion could not see Sirius in this moment. If he saw the dog, he would see Padfoot and know why the dog was so smart. If he saw the man, I would never again.

"I'll be up to the house in just a minute, Rion," I said, trying to hide my desperation. "Why don't you go tell Jess to stop yelling for me? I'll be right there."

Rion stepped closer to me instead. "Will you tell me who the man was? The man who is now a dog?"

Shit.

"What are you talking about?" I said, trying in vain to dissuade him. This was so much easier when he was six.

"Mom, c'mon, I'm not six anymore." _Damnit, I know, and it's making this difficult!_ "Who is he?"

"I…" For the first time I turned and looked down at Padfoot (who was, indeed, a dog at the moment). He didn't seem to know what to do either. Somehow, he still looked excited about the whole thing. I sighed. "I can't tell you."

"Please," Orion said, stepping closer. "You _can_ you just don't want to."

My head snapped up. "Orion Canopus Northen you do _not_ talk to your mother like that, do you understand me?" His demeanor immediately collapsed. "Now go back to the house. I will tell you who he was when I tell you. Alright?" I _hate_ yelling at him. There's a reason he gets away with so much stuff.

"…Fine," he said angrily, before turning towards the house.

"Orion," I said firmly. I still had a bit of Mother Tone going, so he stopped. He didn't face me, though, and that bothered me. "I _will_ tell you," I promised, my voice completely void of the Mother Tone (thankfully). "It's just very complicated and, well, now is a very bad time for it." He nodded a little before walking away. I let him go this time.

When I turned around, Sirius was already gone. Buckbeak had disappeared as well, so I assumed he had herded the beast away in dog form as soon as he thought it was safe. I was disappointed, but I supposed that was the most sensible thing to do. Still. The night had been so wonderful. It figured the morning would suck a bit.

Slowly I turned and made my way to the house, following my son's dejected footsteps. I did not want to deal with Jess right now. I wanted to change and to run. I wanted to forget the awful timing and poor reaction from this morning. But I couldn't. I was not really a puma; I could not really run whenever I felt the whim.

You know that elated feeling I had felt about five minutes ago? I couldn't even remember what that felt like by the time I got to the house.

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Jess was furious. Well, she wasn't really furious. She was worried out of her mind, and because I was perfectly fine and had simply 'fallen asleep' in a tree she was pissed about being worried for nothing. So, essentially, she was furious. However, since her kids were still upstairs asleep (somehow) she had to keep her voice down. She didn't want to wake them up, though clearly she had no problem with waking my son up and letting him wander into the forest. Psh.

She basically sat me down on the living room couch and lectured me. Naturally, I started to become angry right back at her. She had no right to treat me like a child. Just because she was a mother did not entitle her to mother everyone. I was perfectly capable of handling myself, especially being an Animagi and all. In fact, the more I thought about it, the more I thought I was better able to take care of myself than she was. Especially in a forest! Has she completely forgotten why they call me Puma? Besides, I think I had proved I could fight—she knew I had fought in the war against Lord Voldemort, and I had survived, hadn't I? I even brought some Death Eaters down. Sure, I was only in it a week and only took out two people, but it was more than she ever put in. While I was trying desperately not to die, she was sitting safely at her desk in Minnesota worrying about her second pregnancy. Hell, she's even been mugged! She's a bloody WITCH for Merlin's sake, and she got mugged! She said she was afraid of breaking the law, but I'm pretty sure being attacked is a fairly legitimate reason for breaking the Statute of Secrecy. She's even friends with a lawman, a good one. If they tried to imprison her, he would destroy them in court.

But I was perfectly fine with letting her lecture me. Maybe I didn't quite deserve it, but I knew Orion could hear her and for some reason I felt he deserved to hear all of it. Not that any of it was really important. Not until she started talking about his father, that is…

"…It's just like when you got knocked up with Orion, you have no sense of responsibility!" she said. That ticked me off. "Whatever dolt you fell for just left you hanging, and now Orion encourages you to keep acting like a child simply because he's a child!"

"That is _enough,_ Jess!" I exploded. Suddenly I was standing. When did I stand?

"I beg your pardon?" She seemed honestly taken aback that I was upset. Wtf.

"His father is a GOOD man. He always was! I don't know how many times I tried to tell you that, but apparently it never got through your thick skull. He never abandoned us because he never even _knew_ about Orion!" Her mouth dropped momentarily. "Shit happened, and that was that. For years I've listened to you ripping at him just because he wasn't around, but you have no idea. You never did. He couldn't be there, and I accepted that. I even accepted you irrationally hating him." I looked her dead in the eye, making sure I had her full attention. "Not anymore. The next crack about Orion's father ends in the two of us booking the next flight home." There was silence.

That's when I noticed that Tyler was standing, shocked, in the kitchen doorway, holding an entirely untouched cup of coffee. Orion had stopped trying to be hidden and simply sat on the staircase, completely blank-faced. Padfoot was standing in the doorway, gently wagging his tail.

"Besides," I continued, looking back at Jess, "there is nothing wrong with a bit of childishness. You're the one who used a picture of your family completely covered in cookie dough as your last Christmas picture. You even had it in your hair, if I remember right." I paused. "You don't get old until you stop having fun, remember?"

"Growing up is different than growing old, Rya," Jess said quietly.

"Not by much. I don't plan on showing my age until I have to. It's more fun this way. If you have a problem with that, well, then maybe Rion and I should go get a hotel somewhere."

No one said anything for a minute, so I sat back down. Immediately I regretted it: there was far too much adrenaline in my body now to sit still, but I refused to stand again. That would be admitting I'm antsy, and I didn't feel that would be in my favor. Padfoot padded over to me and jumped on the couch next to me. Technically he wasn't allowed, but at that point I didn't care and Jess was still too far in shock to react.

"Who was Orion's father, if I may ask?" Tyler said from the kitchen doorway. I simply stared at him for a minute, and he started to look very uncomfortable. Only three times before had I ever become quite this angry, and the first time I had several people tell me after that my eyes were frightening. Something about them became more cat-like, or something, and my friends said it felt like my eyes were burning into their very bodies. Upon remembering this I looked away, apologetic. I did not want Tyler to feel so uncomfortable. It was an honest question. It deserved an honest answer.

"I loved Orion's father more than any other man," I started. "I still do, in fact," I added, looking down at Padfoot. He licked my cheek. I smiled. "His name is Sirius Black."

"WHAT?!?"

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hehehe.... bet you weren't expecting that, were you? yeah, me neither. rya was feeling pretty bold i guess. hehehe. i'm excited to write the next chapter now too. hehehe...

reviews remind me to update, so you should REVIEW!!!


	10. The Dangers of Hysteria

invisible internet presents to k9cat, winni3, humanthesaurus, sam, and seanymph!!

Merry Christmas!!

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I couldn't help but grin at their reactions. It wasn't like I expected anything else from them; they didn't know anything about him except what the papers said. Still, the shock… it was hilarious. Jessica's face was absolutely horrified; there was no other word for it. Tyler simply looked shocked, which by itself was quite amusing. He had the most stereotypical 'shocked face' I had ever seen in my life: his jaw was hanging open and his eyes were popping. I looked up at Rion to see a smile slowly spread across his face as he noted their hilarious reactions as well. He was impressed I had told them so bluntly, and his smile only grew when he caught my eye. Finally, I looked down at Padfoot. His face alone kept me from laughing. He was not amused. He did not think what I had just done was funny. Then again, he didn't look angry either. He didn't really look anything.

Tyler recovered first. "You knew… Sirius Black?" he stuttered. His eyes had stopped trying to escape his skull, which I was grateful for. It had started to look eerie. Jess's horrified expression grew slightly.

"Yes," I responded simply, knowing no one who cared to hear what I was saying could process more than a little at a time. "I knew him very well." I decided against saying 'Still do, in fact.'

"Did you know…?" Tyler started. He looked at me as if it were obvious what the end of his sentence should be. I looked, confused, back at him. "Did you know he was going to do what he did?"

I sighed. I should have expected this to come up quickly. I tried to quickly decide how to handle the situation. Maybe telling them this without planning ahead was a bad idea.

"You did, didn't you?!" Jess yelled when I didn't answer right away. Well, it was more like a shriek, really. Padfoot, Orion and I all jumped at the sound.

"Jessica, honey, calm down," Tyler said, approaching us for the first time. Her eyes were still wide and wild. I wasn't sure if she even heard him.

"He's a MURDERER, Rya!" She yelled.

"You don't know anything about him!" I yelled back, getting defensive. I knew I should be reasoning with her, and that she was far too into hysterics to be thinking clearly. I just couldn't ignore the word. I couldn't turn it away for the lie it was. "You have no idea!" I continued.

Jess seemed so lost in hysteria that she couldn't properly respond. Tyler took the opening. "Jess, Rya, calm down. This was all a long time ago. Let's talk reasonably." Jess swung her head over towards him, staring at him as if he were mad. He glanced over at me, at my wand being aimed at Jess. I caught his eye and shrugged. He nodded.

Under my breath I muttered the spell that would knock her out. She didn't even realize she went down, but Tyler caught her and swung her up into his arms. He paused, one foot towards the stairs. "You'll still be here, right?" he asked me uncertainly. Padfoot growled a little, but I nodded. "Right," Tyler said, and carried his wife upstairs.

Orion was still sitting on a step just below the living room ceiling. I debated whether or not to tell him to go to bed. Then I debated whether or not I would mean it. No matter what I said, he would hear this conversation. It was far too intriguing for him, and he was far too good at sneaking around (as proven before I spilled his father's name). I sighed and looked up at him. "I should tell you to go to bed, you know," I said.

"Are you going to?" he asked in reply.

My internal debate quickly resigned. "Only in the sense that Tyler should think you're obeying me," was my answer. He grinned his father's grin.

"Thanks Mom," he said, starting to stand.

"Don't thank me. This is me being too lazy to tell the story twice." He knew I was lying, but he dashed off in the direction of his room. His footsteps were heard a short distance, as if he were stomping angrily. Then Tyler descended down the stairs.

"Orion looks unhappy," he stated.

"I told him to go to bed." That was sort of the truth.

"Good idea." Ha, you don't even know what the idea was. "So…" he started.

"I did not know what was going to happen that Halloween night," I began for him. "Sirius and I met that September, but I couldn't stay long. Then I was pregnant and… well… I didn't get back to London until a few days later." Despite the fact that I had started the ball rolling, he still looked uncomfortable questioning me. I sighed. "Go on and ask me whatever you want Tyler, I trust you and I'm not ashamed." This seemed to startle him a bit.

"How did you two meet?" he asked, trying to make it sound conversational.

"I got lost the first day I was in London and ended up in a pub called the Leaky Cauldron. He was there and started talking to me." I could still remember that evening perfectly. The odd conversation, the drunk, the kiss, the walk… That night changed my life irrevocably.

"Just like that?" Tyler asked, disbelieving.

"Just like that," I responded. "We talked for a long while. He defended me when a drunk thought I was a whore. He took me on a tour of Diagon Alley—"

"You were alone with him?!?" Tyler interrupted. I pursed my lips, irritated.

"He is not a killer," I said quietly.

"Rya, I know you may have loved him then but he killed, what, _thirteen_ people? One of which was his old friend!" Padfoot started growling fiercely, breaking through Tyler's train of thought. I gently rubbed his neck, asking without words that he calm down. "I know you might not want to believe it," Tyler finally continued, "but he _is_ a killer."

"No, he isn't," I responded stubbornly.

"Rya—"

"How do you know that's what really happened that night?" I interrupted, getting even more irritated. "How do you know the plans hadn't changed? How do you even know, absolutely positively, that Sirius was their Secret-Keeper?" Tyler's face stepped back into shock, as if he was surprised I knew so many of the details. "Sirius was so obvious," I continued, regurgitating what he himself had said. "Anyone with brains would realize the Potters' had made him the Secret-Keeper. What if he realized it too, and tried to change the plan? Tried to make it harder for Voldemort—" Tyler winced, "to find the trail?" I leaned closer to Tyler, trying to make him understand. "What if everyone has it backwards?" I whispered conspiratorially. "What if Sirius was hunting Pettigrew? What if Pettigrew didn't actually die? He's a wizard, after all. He could have simply…" I snapped my fingers, "…disappeared."

Tyler gawked for a moment before snapping out of it. "Rya, really, you can't possibly believe such nonsense." He said it more like he hoped I didn't believe it.

"You're right, I don't believe it," I said. Padfoot's head whipped up to look at me while Tyler visibly relaxed. "I know it." Tyler stiffened immediately, whereas Padfoot's tongue lolled out. I looked down, unable to properly explain. "Tyler, I know you probably won't believe me, but I knew Sirius much better than anyone outside of his circle did. Well, outside of the Marauders, really."

"That's just it, Rya," Tyler started. "You _knew_ him. That was a long time ago."

"Yes, but only a month before everything happened. He was the man I knew that night. He still is. James was better than a brother to Sirius. He could never do that."

Tyler stared at me a moment. "What do you mean, 'he still is?'" he asked suspiciously.

I panicked a little, but only a little. "Trust me. I know it."

"_How_ do you know it, though?"

I panicked a little more and scrambled for an answer. "Woman's intuition."

Tyler continued to eye me. "That's some powerful intuition, then," he said finally. His face and tone clearly showed that he didn't believe me. I was alright with that. It's not like I was being honest.

"Sirius is not a murderer. He should never have had to go to prison—"

"So you're happy about his escape, then?" Tyler asked accusingly.

I didn't answer right away. Should I be honest? I could scare him into hysterics as well. He was harder to frighten than Jess (obviously), but I think his hysterics would be worse. More powerful. More dangerous. Then again, he was always quite reasonable. I had made it quite clear that I still loved Sirius and that I firmly believed he hadn't done the awful deeds on his record. Maybe Tyler would just take it in stride.

Hopefully.

"To be honest, Tyler, I'm ecstatic about it."

His eyes popped again.

"You've seen him, haven't you?" he asked in the darkest tone I had ever heard him use. It frightened me, and I scooted a little closer to Padfoot. I also didn't answer Tyler, afraid to lie and afraid to be honest. "You're corresponding with him?" I supposed talking counted as corresponding, didn't it? "_He knows where you are, doesn't he?_" Tyler whispered. His voice was scarier still.

"Tyler, he's not dangerous—" I started, but the room exploded around me before I could finish. Tyler had lost control of his emotions, and therefore his magic.

Damnit. I _hate_ it when that happens. One never knows what affects it may cause. And yet they are always surprising.

Like when I rolled over, groaning, and saw Sirius unconscious on the floor a few feet away. Sirius. Not Padfoot. I quickly sat up, losing my vision momentarily to dizziness, and looked for Tyler. He wasn't moving. I waved my wand over both men, making sure they were only unconscious. I crawled as quickly as I could to Sirius, hoping to get him awake enough to transform before Tyler was awake enough to notice he could. "_Ennervate,_" I whispered, pointing my wand at Sirius. He stirred, but did not wake. _"Damnit!_" I whispered, a bit louder than I intended. I heard a male voice groan.

"Mom?" My eyes flew to the stairs, where Orion was emerging from a pile of dust. He only had one small cut on his cheek. I had forgotten he was listening in. I stood quickly to race over to him, and even faster became dizzy again. I propped myself on what was left of the couch. "Mom!" He said it louder and more frighten this time, and I could hear him scrambling over the rubble towards me.

Then he was there, right in front of me, one hand on each of my shoulders. "Mom, there is a huge cut on your forehead," he said calmly, though I could hear the panic beneath it. "You're bleeding like crazy. You need to heal it." I only nodded in response. His voice was kind of fuzzy. "MOM!" he said, more commanding. "HEAL YOUR FOREHEAD!" I weakly lifted my arm, but Orion had to help me hold it there. I obediently said the spell. Almost instantaneously I was better. The weakness was stubborn enough to leave a little behind, but otherwise I was fine.

"Thank you, Orion," I said gratefully. That's when I remembered what was going on. "You need to get out of here right now!" I said suddenly.

"No, it's too late for that Mom," Orion said. He looked back at Sirius, his expression confused and unsure. "That's Padfoot, isn't it?" he asked me. It was too late to hide the truth now. I nodded. "Is Padfoot Sirius Black?" I hesitated before nodding again. Orion's face dropped into unhappy contemplation. "Are you sure he's innocent? Decent? Not dangerous at all?" I nodded vehemently in response to every question. "Then we need to get him out of here before Tyler wakes up."

Almost on cue, Tyler's form moaned. I had to throw shock aside as my son accepted his father without a second thought. That would have to be dealt with later. Now, I was levitating Sirius' still unconscious body out the front door that Orion held open, hoping that Tyler would not contact anyone about his nightmare.

Hoping, too, that whatever Tyler had done to make Sirius transform was reversible.

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see you next year! and REVIEW! i already have the next chapter written, i merely wait for your requests...


	11. Deceiving

i am SO sorry! i uploaded the wrong chapter and left you all confused! and i didn't even realize until just now when i went to post this chapter and realized i already had! oh man, i feel ridiculous.

i am SO sorry.

so... now the chapter i was supposed to post is up before this one like it's supposed to be. again--i am SO SORRY!!!!

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Once the two of us had dragged Sirius' still unconscious form into the woods a little ways I made Orion go back to the house. He tried to fight me, to convince me I'd be better off with him with me. He even turned his trickster charms on me, but as his mother they had very little effect. Eventually I won him over with logic. Tyler—and therefore Jess—thought Rion had been in his room during the second half of that conversation. If he and I were to keep up that façade, he ought to be with the other kids right then, wondering what on earth happened to the living room and worrying about Tyler being hurt and Jess not waking up. Besides, I could always explain my disappearance on my inner puma. She has been known to take control of me without permission on a few occasions—maybe she was so startled by Tyler's explosion that she forced control and bolted. No one would know.

So, moping, Orion made his way back to the house. Sirius, unfortunately, was still barely responding to _Ennervate_, and the night was starting to become chilly. I wanted to go inside, go to bed. I wanted this whole night to be over. I was beginning to regret my rash decision to spill the beans about Sirius.

Then he moaned a real, conscious moan. "Rya?" he grumbled.

"Merlin, Sirius, you're awake!" I responded, dropping on the ground next to him. While he had been unconscious I had healed everything visible on both of us, but I knew I probably missed a few things. "Are you alright?"

He looked around, clearly dazed. "I'm human?"

I chuckled. "Only a little."

He was too confused to laugh back, and instead asked, "What happened?"

"Tyler kind of… exploded. Magically." He sat up a little, rubbing his head. I sat back on my heels, trying to give him room while staying near him. "Whatever magic he released turned you human and wouldn't allow me to magic you awake."

"So you magicked me into the forest?" he asked, his voice still muddled and lost. I began to wonder if he hit his head on something during the explosion.

"No…" I was hesitant about telling Sirius about Orion helping when he was in such a state, but I knew he would force the truth out of me quickly anyway. "Your son helped me carry you out here."

There was no reaction at first. Sirius just sort of nodded and tried to stand. Once he was fully upright, he froze. "What?" He looked wide-eyed at me, suddenly very alert.

"You heard what I said to Orion," I started defensively. "He heard everything. He was there for everything. He saw you, and no Padfoot, and just… I don't know… figured it out, I guess." I was avoiding looking at Sirius' eyes. Would he be mad about this? I wasn't sure anymore.

"And so he helped you?" Sirius asked, disbelieving. "With me?"

I nodded. "He actually offered." I smiled a little. I was proud of Orion.

Suddenly Sirius was hugging me. "Sirius?" I said, my voice confused and muffled by his shoulder. He threw me back, but caught me by the shoulders. He was smiling. "What?" I asked, starting to get a little frightened. Sirius hugged me again in response, though far more gently this time.

"He believes," was all he said. Sirius didn't care about being exploded, or practically revealed in front of an entire family, or anything else that happened. All that he cared about was that his son didn't hate him. His son believed he was innocent. That was all that mattered. "My son… Our son…" He sounded so happy, so free, it was incredible. It was hard to believe I had ever heard his voice sound so light. "He believes in me. In us."

I couldn't help but smile. Sirius was right. He was pointing out what I hadn't had time to notice in the rush of not letting Tyler see an escaped convict on his living room floor. Orion was willing to keep up the charade with us, to help even. He may not have believed me before, but he had very clearly changed his mind. "I love you, Sirius," I said finally. He was still holding me in his warm, strong arms.

"I love you too, Rya."

I sighed…and then yawned. "Can you transform?" I asked curiously. He released me and did so. My shoulders slumped a little in relief. "Wonderful. Come back please. I want you to hold me a little longer." He became human and immediately hugged me again. "So here's the story. Puma took over because Tyler's explosion scared the shit out of her. She ran, you followed—once you became conscious that is."

"And when did I become conscious?" Sirius asked seriously (a/n: best sentence ever!). He was a pro at lying and knew he needed to get the details right.

"After me and before Tyler. You're a dog. Time doesn't matter."

"Right, of course." He was still holding me tightly against him, warming every inch of my skin. I couldn't get far enough into his embrace.

"Anyway, you followed me. Eventually Puma calmed down and I was able to get control again. So I ran us both back." I almost wished there was more to the story so I had reason to hold him longer.

"I suppose I should be panting when we dash through the door then?"

I thought a moment. "Probably. Since I wasn't able to make sure Tyler was alright before I left, I would be—will be—terribly worried about him and the house. I will want to hurry." He nodded in agreement. "In fact, I think I'll dash in the door as Puma, because I am that worried."

"That sounds like you," Sirius affirmed.

I smiled. "I'm glad you know me well."

"I'm happy to know you well." He paused a moment. "I'm glad you know me well too." It only took me a second to realize what he really meant. I merely squeezed him tightly before regretfully releasing him.

"We should probably get back. Puma wouldn't have been all _that_ frightened." I was avoiding his gaze still.

"True, but since she was in full control, you didn't exactly know where you were. That probably took a bit." I nodded in agreement, smiling again. He thinks of everything. "Rya, look at me," he said, placing one finger under my chin and lifting my face to his. His eyes were intense again. "Thank you for getting me out of there before Tyler awoke," he said. "Thank you for convincing my son I am not who he thought I was. Thank you for making us a family." He was holding my face in both hands now. "Thank you for giving me a family, for giving me love, for everything." He kissed me gently. "I owe you more than I can ever repay you."

Okay, I admit it, I had tears in my eyes. "As long as you love me you won't owe me anything," I said in response.

He chuckled and shook his head in response. "Whatever you say, Little Puma." My resolve disappeared when his used my nickname. I lost control of my eyes and several tears escaped. He wiped each away with his thumb before kissing me again. "Cry later, Rya," he said gently, knowing that telling me not to cry was no help whatsoever. "We have deceiving to do right now." That made me laugh, and within moments the tears were gone and I was ready to go. I knew being a cat—even for a brief period—would erase what small signs of crying were left on my face.

"Let's not do too much, though," I said before he could transform. "I'm ready for bed." I winked and transformed before he could respond. He narrowed his eyes at me and transformed as well, using animal language to tell me I was being 'such a cat.' I merely smiled and bolted towards the house, trying to put as much energy into the short distance as I could. Padfoot was merely feet behind me, barking happily as soon as the house came into view.

We both blasted through the front door. I transformed immediately, dashing towards where a startled Tyler sat surrounded by seven startled children (including Orion, who looked just as confused and surprised as the rest).

"Are you alright?!" I asked quickly, gently shoving children out of my way. I could hear Padfoot's tail wagging against something a few feet away, as if he'd just had the most fun romp he'd ever had.

"I'm fine," Tyler said sluggishly. "What happened?"

I looked around at all the kids, as if unsure what to say. "Well… you know… we were talking…" I looked around again. Tyler suddenly understood why I was floundering.

"What happened to you, I mean?" he swiftly corrected.

"Oh." I tried to look a little embarrassed. I took the increased tempo of Padfoot's tail as a sign that I succeeded. "Um… You know how there's kind of a Puma... within me?" I said, hesitating and floundering in all the right spots. "Sometimes she… takes control without permission. And the explosion freaked her pretty bad." I kept my eyes averted, still trying to be embarrassed. "She ran. And therefore so did I. Padfoot followed her—me—I think, because he was there when I finally got control again." Tyler nodded. This made sense. Dogs like to chase things, especially cats. This should be no exception. "It took me a bit to figure out which way was home, but when I did I pretty much hauled butt back here." The younger kids giggled at my use of the word 'butt' and a few girls made 'ew' noises (Padfoot had decided to emphasize the 'butt haul' by drooling from his vigorously panting mouth). Tyler, however, just looked up at me confused.

"Why?" he said.

"Well… it _was_ an explosion. I didn't know if you were hurt or not. And with Jess being… um…" I quickly decided against telling the kids she was magically unconscious, "asleep and all I didn't know if anyone would be around."

"We would have woken Mom up!" one of the older girls said.

"I realize that, now," I said. "But at the time I was worried and panicked. I didn't think about it." The kids took this as an honest answer. I looked back at Tyler, my expression still one of worry. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah," he said, his voice sounding much clearer now. He should his head and stood. "Some bumps and bruises, nothing I can't handle." He sighed. "I was just really confused for awhile there."

"Why is that?" I asked, intrigued.

"For some reason I thought Orion was in the explosion too." He was watching the floor as he said this, so he didn't see me worriedly glance at Rion, who had thankfully had the forethought to brush all the dust off himself.

"I was upstairs," Rion said sullenly. "Mom made me go to bed beforehand." He looked so put out about missing the explosion that I almost believed him. I decided he was definitely going to get some sort of reward for acting this wonderfully.

"Hm. Oh well." Tyler shrugged it off and looked around the slightly destroyed room. The couch was ripped in half and a couple vases had shattered, but that was the worst damage. It was mostly an air explosion. "I guess I should clean this up before… Jess wakes up," he said, going along with me.

"Mom would have a fit if she saw this!" said one of the middle girls.

"That would be awful!" one of the twins said.

"Do you mind if I don't help?" I asked Tyler, yawning. "I'm pretty tired after that run, and there's not a whole lot to do."

"Not at all!" Tyler said. He seemed in a much better mood after his magical explosion. "Go to bed, Rya. You're the guest, after all. You shouldn't help clean up messes, especially those made by others."

"Thanks," I said, yawning again to make sure he was convinced. "Goodnight everyone!" I said. The Henderson kids all chorused a "Goodnight Aunt Rya" back to me, while Orion simply followed me towards the stairs. I didn't object.

Once we reached his guest room door, I stopped and hugged him. Padfoot was standing at our feet. "Thank you for understanding and believing," I whispered to Rion. He shrugged.

"He's my dad." He let go of me and knelt down, putting one hand on Padfoot's shoulder. He sat like that for a minute, clearly trying to adjust to the idea of his incredibly smart dog not only being human but also his father. Eventually, though, he said two words that I will never forget for the rest of my life.

"Hi, Dad."

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aw, that last part makes me so happy.

i still feel silly though.


	12. For the First Time

i got this done WAY sooner than expected, so HAPPY VDAY!! single or doubled, you're all still awesome dorks.

especially ladyblue, k9cat, peaceless, seanymph (even though technically you reviewed a different story), and moonbeams (don't worry we'll have a chat with tyler next chapter, he didn't want to freak out the kids). the rest of you fail. i mean, come on, i know school is a buttmunch and eats your lives, but really? it's been about a month since the last chapter was posted. that is MORE than enough time. even just reviewing telling me to update soon counts. so yeah, REVIEW.

on with the cliffhanger story (ehehehe)...

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I found it impossible to stop smiling that night as I fell asleep. I knew tomorrow Jess and Tyler would want more answers, and Rion would undoubtedly want to know more about his father, and Sirius would undoubtedly want to transform and touch his son for the first time. I knew tomorrow was going to be an emotional roller coaster, but none of it mattered yet. Sirius was curled up at my side, unwilling to stay at my feet like a normal dog, wrapped tightly in my arms. I couldn't let him go after the night we had just had. Not only had our secret rendezvousing been nearly exposed to an entire family, but our son—who could, for the first time in almost thirteen years, be called _our_ son—had finally accepted and greeted his father.

It was one of the few moments that I will cherish for the rest of my life. _"Hi, Dad."_ That was all he said, but it was enough. Sirius had licked him on the forehead before placing one paw on each of his son's shoulders. They looked at each other long and hard before we heard footsteps on the stairs. I hugged Orion again, told him we loved him, and walked away.

It wasn't until I crawled into bed that I noticed there were tears on my face.

"I love you, Sirius," I whispered into the rough fur beside me. Padfoot wiggled around just enough to get his snout close enough to gently lick my nose. It was his way of saying, "I love you too."

o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o

Jess was sitting at the end of my bed by the time I woke up the next morning. She held tea in one hand, according to the chamomile smell permeating my room, and coffee in the other. The latter was offered to me—and accepted gratefully—mere moments after I sat up. Sirius lay perfectly still, clearly uncomfortable but not wanting to make the situation worse by growling.

"I…" Jess started. "I'm sorry about last night." I knew this was difficult for her, so I decided against interrupting. "I just… All the reports have me worried about the kids. According to the _Prophet_ he attacked a few kids at Hogwarts. Azkaban's only escapee got into _Hogwarts_. That's not supposed to be possible. If he can get in there, with Dumbledore or whatever his name is, what chance do Tyler and I have of protecting our kids?" She sighed deeply, trying to stay calm, and took a long drink of her tea. "I'm just worried. And knowing that he is so closely connected to my family freaked me out a bit."

"A bit?" I asked teasingly, knowing by now that she was capable of keeping herself calm. She smiled, shamefaced.

"Tyler said you two talked after I passed out," she said, trying to keep the curiosity and suspicion out of her voice.

"For a little bit." She didn't say anything for a moment. "If you want to ask me questions you can, Jess. I'm staying in your house. I think you're entitled to some answers." At least, _I_ would feel entitled to some answers if it were me.

"I just…" She sighed. "I just need to know you didn't know, you know?"

After a moment or two her sentence made sense to me. "I didn't know what was going to happen that Halloween," I said finally. "I was not a part of that. Ever. But…" I felt bad telling her how I felt about that occasion after watching her visibly relax. She didn't want to know anything more than that I wasn't involved, but I was sick of letting everyone believe the newspapers. "What you have to understand, Jess, is that I don't believe Sirius was a part of it either." Guilt hit me the moment she tensed up again. "I know you think he's awful or whatever, but you have to trust me when I say I knew him very well and he would _never_ have done that."

"But… his family, and the evidence, and… how can you be sure anyway?" She sounded almost like she wanted to believe me, which gave me hope.

"Look at my family. You wouldn't say I'm like them, would you?"

"No." Confidence was starting to return to her. "But that's just your family. His family was evil for _generations_."

Padfoot growled, causing Jess to frown at him. Clearly she was still suspicious of our eerily interested dog. "Jess," I said, pulling her attention away from him, "Evil is not a genetic trait. His relatives were all raised that way because that's how their parents were raised. He was just one of few who had the balls to notice something was wrong." The growls coming from the head of the bed ceased.

"Please…" Jess said, not believing me. Again.

"I'm serious. He told me about an uncle of his—or at least I think it was an uncle, it may have been a cousin…or maybe both, I'm not sure—that was also disowned and thrown out of the family for not being Slytherin enough. He wasn't the only one. It happens." Jess took another long pull from her tea, making me realize I hadn't touched my coffee. I took a quick sip so she wouldn't get offended or anything silly like that. "Look, I know it's all very hard to believe. It's just… I knew him right before this happened—"

"How well?" Jess interrupted. "Maybe he was just acting around you. Maybe he was one of those guys who only hooks up with chicks who are on vacation." Padfoot started growling again, but far softer this time. "That was a long time ago, maybe—because of Orion—you just convinced yourself—"

"Orion was the name Sirius wanted to name his son," I said, returning the interruption. Jess' jaw dropped, and once again Padfoot went silent. He sat up finally, wanting to watch the conversation unfold. "There was one day when we ran into a family with a bunch of little kids, and the subject of names came up, and I asked him what he would want to name his kids. He said he wanted his son to be named Orion Canopus. So he was." I looked over at Padfoot, at his gently thumping tail, and noticed for the first time that the door was slightly ajar and there was an odd shadow lurking behind it. I allowed myself a small smile. "And as to knowing Sirius, trust me when I say he was an awful liar when it mattered. He could lie to people standing by about who dropped the stink bomb, but the Marauders never believed him when he said he wasn't afraid for them." _Well, maybe Pettigrew did, but he was a dickwad anyway._ "He can't act. He is what he feels, for the most part. The only thing he could ever hide was pain or fear, but even then his closest friends could still see it. I could see it. A person's demeanor changes around you when they know that could be the last time they see you alive." I dwelled for a moment before Padfoot nudged my face, bringing me away from those memories. "Besides, he stopped being a ladies man after school, from what I understand. I think Remus' taunting and James' settling down got to him." I grinned to myself, not willing to look at Padfoot and give Jess another hint about our odd dog.

"You sound like you still love him," Jess said softly.

"I do, Jess."

She sat for a moment in silent contemplation, and I took the opportunity to drink more of my coffee. It was delicious once I took the time to taste it, and for that moment I thoroughly missed having Jess back home. I had forgotten how tasty her coffee always was. Whenever we went out for a Girls' Night or a celebration or whatever I always stayed at her place, simply because she had the good coffee. That was always one of my favorite parts about getting drunk with our friends; Jess' coffee was not only delicious, but cured all but the worst hangovers in one cup. I used to call it Miracle Brew.

"Rya, I want to believe you, it's just hard to after all I've heard about him. Can you understand that?" Her eyes pleaded with me. She seemed almost ashamed of last night.

"Of course I can. I just want you to give the idea a chance."

"I think I can manage that." She took a deep breath. "You promise my family isn't in any danger?" she asked, fear in her eyes.

"I swear on all things magic that Sirius Black is not going to hurt your family. Not intentionally, anyway." She laughed, and I felt the atmosphere around us lift a bit. Padfoot set his head on my lap, allowing me to scratch at his ears.

"I am sorry about last night," Jess said finally.

"It's okay. I think I understand where you're coming from." Being girls, we hugged, happy that we were both satisfied with the conversation. Padfoot even licked Jess on the face, something he had yet to do, causing her to giggle again.

"You know, I still don't believe he's just a dog, but he is quite the dog!" With that she stood and walked out of the room.

I took the time to set my coffee on the bedside table before calling out to him. Padfoot's ears perked as he walked into the room sheepishly.

"Did he…" his gaze shifted to the attentive mutt beside me, "did you really come up with my name?" Padfoot nodded. I grabbed my wand and sealed the door, putting an extra charm on it to alert us if someone was close to entering. Padfoot watched me, immediately understanding what I was doing. His eyes connected with mine, and despite my better judgment I nodded.

He jumped off the bed in one lithe movement and in seconds Sirius Black was standing in my bedroom. Orion's jaw hung slightly open and he looked to be at a loss for words. I stood, fumbling with and almost tripping over my sheets. "Sirius, this is Orion Canopus Northen, our son. Orion, this is Sirius Black…your father."

Orion was twelve already, while Sirius was in his thirties, and both had tears in their eyes. Sirius reached one hand up to Rion's face, tracing his cheek. Orion simply stood there tensely, unsure what to do or how to act. How does one greet the father they never knew anything about until a week ago? But Sirius took care of all that by grabbing Orion and hugging him so tightly he might break. I heard sobs, but couldn't immediately tell which one of them was crying. It was hard enough for me to keep myself from crying. I heard muttering, and as soon as I deciphered what the muttering was I lost control of my tear ducts.

They were both crying, but Sirius was muttering, "My son… I have a son… We have a son… A _son_…" over and over again.

I couldn't stop myself from sobbing with them, and in moments they were both standing there with me, holding me, crying with me, and for the first time in a long time I felt whole. I think for the first time in a long time we all felt whole, because for the first time—ever—we were a family.

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okay, here you are folks! we'll get to deal with tyler next time (he did EXPLODE his living room, after all) and many other goodies.

REVIEW and remind me you're waiting!


	13. PostHardcoreCuddling Activities

forgive me any grammar/spelling errors, i literally just typed this thing up and feel like posting it but don't feel like re-reading it. but i think you'll like it anyway. ;D

late st. patrick's day cookies go to: peaceless, k9cat, seanymph, sirius love, ladyblue, humanthesaurus, and shadowchild.

to the rest of you, leave reviews! i love them and they remind me that i have to update eventually!

(no i don't think you'll need tissues for this one... but if you're an extra emotional person maybe one or two.)

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The three of us spent a good hour sitting up in my room talking, mostly about Orion and his childhood. Sirius wanted to know everything: first words, first steps, birthdays, friends, school—everything. Orion seemed more than willing to give it to him, but I could tell he was struggling against saying something along the lines of "you should have been there," because he knew well enough by now that Sirius would have been if he could have. Eventually Rion started asking questions of his own about the two of us, now that I was answering said questions, as well as asking about Sirius. He loved that his father was prankster in school, and somehow I knew the pranks were about to get a lot more clever and intricate. He couldn't be outdone by his _father_, after all. That would be _lame._

Eventually, however, my charms warned us that Tyler was coming up the stairs, and I thought it was best to end the reunion until further notice. Sirius changed back into Padfoot, unhappily, and Rion dashed out of the room and into his before Tyler turned into our hallway. I heard Rion's door slowly creak open and him yawn loudly as Tyler walked past, and I couldn't stop the smile. That's my boy, tricking people without trying.

You'd think that would bother me, but it almost made me proud. He truly was his father's son, and I had wanted that so badly for so long. Besides, Sirius had never pulled his tricks on me (not that he ever really had the chance) and Rion knew better than to pull anything too intense on his mother.

"Rya?" Tyler called through the crack in my door. "May I come in?"

"Of course Tyler." I made a fuss of the blankets, as if I had fallen back asleep after Jess left and was reawakening myself. He didn't seem to notice, but I thought it was better to be cautious. "What's up?" I asked him.

"Last night…" He sighed. I looked at him, confused. Padfoot pulled his tongue back in his mouth and closed his jaw in order to be more attentive. I had thought Tyler remembered everything from the night before, but now I wasn't as sure. "I overreacted a bit to you, and I apologize for that," he finally started. "I just… I have to protect my family, and you being in contact with a mass murderer who knows where you are kind of accomplishes the exact opposite of that." Didn't Jess and I just have this conversation? "Of course, it isn't really my business, but then again, you are staying in my house and it is my family that would pay for any foolishness, so it is kind of my business. I know you think he's harmless, Rya, but I just can't bring myself to believe it." Well, at least I knew he remembered everything now. "I won't call the Ministry or anything, I have no desire to make you hate me, but I need to know, and I feel like I have the right in this situation."

He paused for a long minute, and I wondered if he was waiting for my answer. Soon he was staring at me. "Need to know what, Tyler?" I finally asked, clueless as to what he wanted.

"Are you in contact with him?" His eyes were intense, and I worried for a moment if he would kick me out if I was perfectly honest.

I took a side route. "Sort of?"

I watched his eyes bulge momentarily before he wrestled himself under control again. Clearly he was trying to avoid blowing any other rooms up in his house. "What do you mean, 'sort of?'" He started shaking his head. "No, you know what, I _really _don't want to know. If he knows where you are I'm going to want to kick you out and Jess would _not_ be happy with me. Let's just… start over." He got up and walked out my door, closing it behind him before I could figure out what was going on. Padfoot and I exchanged completely lost glances before there was a knock on my door. "Rya, can I come in?"

It was Tyler. He was _literally_ starting over. What a dork.

"Tyler you idiot just come in." Padfoot's tongue lolled out in doggy laughter. Tyler entered as if he hadn't just done the dorkiest thing ever.

"Good morning," he said. "I just wanted to apologize for…well, exploding on you last night. It was an overreaction, and I am sorry." He was being more formal than usual, but I could tell it was because he was focusing on not wanting to know what he desperately wanted to know.

"Don't worry about it Tyler, I understand and accept your apology." Now what crazy shenanigans are you going to do next?

"Jess is outside with the kids right now, but I am going to go make a large breakfast if you would like to join us," he said.

"That sounds delicious," I replied. Padfoot barked softly, agreeing with me so blatantly that even Tyler couldn't stop the small chuckle that escaped his lips. "I'll be down as soon as I change," I added, thinking in my head that I really ought to shower before I went downstairs. Sleeping with a dog while in the company of humans tends to make people think you smell. Like a dog. Not something I really want to deal with.

Tyler nodded and left, closed the door behind him. I threw myself out of the bed, thinking I would take a quick shower before breakfast, just to wash the smell off. Padfoot stood on the bed quickly, immediately intrigued by my fast movements. "Calm down, mutt," I said smiling. I snatched my shampoo and conditioner from my bag, deciding to just come back here to change. "I want to shower and wash your stinky dog smell off me." He huffed, and I could tell he was trying to take offense at my words. "You know it's true. Dogs smell a certain way, and after our hardcore cuddling last night it's all over me. If I can smell it, everyone else will be able to too, and I'm thinking they'd be grateful of me showering if they smelled the alternative."

Suddenly Padfoot's eyes lit up. He leapt off the bed and stood next to the door. Then he looked back at me, his features more alive and excited than I thought possible for a dog. He wouldn't give me any hints as to what he was thinking, though, so I had to open the door for him. He rushed to the bathroom, and suddenly I understood.

He wanted to shower with me.

And, hell, I wasn't even going to try to convince myself I would say no.

As soon as the door shut behind me he was human again, and he was kissing every inch of my skin he could get to. My p.j.s were still on, but his hands were quickly convincing my skin that the cloth felt absolutely dreadful. If I hadn't thought to bring my wand I never would have thought about the silencing charm that most definitely needed to be up, but even with the reminder I had to shove Sirius away in order to remember the charm itself. Almost before the words left my mouth he took my wand from me and threw it in the sink, but I never heard the clattering sound it made because he took my surprise as an opportunity to whip my shirt off. He had removed his while I cast the spell. Then he was touching me again, eagerly, as if he had been waiting all morning for this moment. His hands were everywhere, especially on my chest; his lips were kissing everything, especially my neck. I couldn't think coherently anymore, but I still managed to choke the words out.

"I love you, Sirius."

His hands calmed, leisurely trailing along my stomach and back, gradually pulling me closer to him. His kisses slowed and began trailing towards my mouth. He kissed me on the lips, softly at first, but harder and more passionately with every second. I could feel his heart beating against my chest, though I had no idea when we had gotten that close, but even more I could feel him pouring his emotions into this kiss. I couldn't hold all of them, though. There was so much need, so much want, and even more love… I wanted to hold all of it, but I couldn't, there was too much, I was overflowing with emotion, his and mine, it was too much…

He broke the kiss, looking at me with concern. "Rya?"

I slowly opened my eyes and felt liquid drop from them. I was crying?

"You okay, little Puma?" Sirius asked.

I thought about it for a moment before letting my p.j. pants slide to the ground. This was not going to be the quick shower I had planned on, but I was okay with that. Sirius was still watching me with concern in his eyes. I grinned and walked over to the shower, turning it on. When I turn back around it was obvious the shower wasn't the only thing I had turned on.

"You coming?" I asked mischievously.

He grinned. "I don't know, will I be?" He was toying with the hem of his pants, waiting for my answer. I couldn't help but smile at his dirty pun. Even still, I needed to feel him inside me more than I needed the sex. It was more important to be as close to him as possible. I walked back over to him and wrapped my arms around his shoulders.

"I know it's not the same in the shower, but I would like you to make love to me now," I said blatantly. Suddenly he was kissing me, and I could feel the same need I had pouring out of him. His hands left me for a few seconds before I heard him kick his pants off. I was forced to break the kiss in order to breathe. "I love you, Sirius," I gasped.

"I love you too, Rya." He stared at me for a moment. "I want to take you somewhere tonight," he said suddenly.

"Where?" I asked, intrigued.

He smiled wickedly, and I knew immediately he wasn't going to answer my question. Instead he started kissing me again, reminding me of why we were both in the bathroom right now. It took all the focus I could muster to actually get us in the shower, but after that all I could think about was his touch and his body against mine. The water washed over our naked bodies, rinsing away the sweat as soon as it appeared, and it wasn't long until he had me screaming, until he was moaning so sexily that it only enhanced my pleasure, until we were both unaware of the screams that erupted because the orgasms were so intense. I felt whole again as we both slid to the floor of the shower. It was barely big enough for two, but we weren't exactly separate people anyway.

"I love you so much Rya," Sirius panted, his eyes closed in exhaustion.

I smiled and kissed his neck, unable to muster enough energy to verbalize my reply. He knew what I was saying anyway and held me tighter.

I knew we would have to go downstairs soon, and I would have to explain the sudden and long shower, but it didn't matter.

Right now, he was mine and I was his and it didn't matter that he was a fugitive and I was a single mom. It didn't matter that we had spent the last twelve years apart, or that I had to raise his son by myself. It didn't matter that we were two of about eight people in the whole world who believed him innocent. It didn't matter. Nothing mattered except feeling each other, and we had most definitely accomplished that.

I kissed his neck again.

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and goodnight.


	14. Names

omg. you guys are going to LOVE me after this. you have no idea.

special non-religious easter baskets with lots of candy go to humanthesaurus (you should be more coherent. it's more funner. ... what?), k9cat (i think you like sweets. you'll like the basket. lots of jelly beans. i 3 jelly beans.), and especially blackrose (welcome to the puma fanclub! yeah i really suck at summaries so i'm not surprised this didn't sound too interesting to you. but i'm glad you gave it a shot!). the rest of you all fail at reviews. and OWE ME bigtime, because i'm still updating sooner than normal.

so please, when you read this, REVIEW. even if you only review three letters (omg). i just like knowing your reactions. ;D

on with the most awesomest chapter ever that you will love me for!

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By the time Padfoot and I made it downstairs a few of Jess and Tyler's kids still hadn't eaten, so it turned out to be just fine I had taken my sweet time getting down there. Rion had been one of the first people to eat, having been up so early, so he was outside with the other kids that had eaten. I was rather glad he wasn't around, actually. He could read me just as well as his father, and he would be able to tell I was practically glowing with happiness. And I didn't want his unintentional curiosity to lead to embarrassing questions or—in his case—scarring thoughts.

Tyler ended up making a special breakfast for Padfoot, too. It was basically all the uneaten breakfast meat and a couple mouthfuls of eggs, but Padfoot wolfed it down as if he had never eaten food before. Tyler said the dog deserved a treat after following me last night to make sure I was okay. I thought the dog deserved a treat after what he did to me in the shower that morning.

Obviously I wasn't going to say that though.

At some point during the meal Jess asked me about the train ride home, reminding me the Orion and I had to go home in less than two days. My glow disappeared so violently that I felt myself deflate. Orion and I had a life to return to, and Sirius might not be able to join us. He might never be able to join us as the father and lover he should be. I was approaching a second end of my time with Sirius, and after how the last end ended up, I was fairly thoroughly depressed by the end of the meal. Padfoot could tell and ended up whining at me with his head in my lap, his eyes begging me to tell him what was wrong. I shook my head at him and walked outside. I wasn't ready to say goodbye, not again.

I knew I should have run harder from him, run further.

But even I couldn't have run forever.

The sunshine helped me ignore the future a bit, forcing me to relax and making me want to take a nap in its warming rays, despite the fact that I had only been awake a few hours. The kids were wrapped in some game or another, so Rion could only just manage a rushed "Hi Mom! Hi Padfoot!" when the two of us walked through the door. Padfoot's entire face perked with interest at the game, but he did not run out and join his son. Instead he looked worriedly up at me.

"Go play, you mutt. I'm fine," I said softly to him. He whined.

I sighed. "I'll tell you later. Go play with him." He hesitated one last moment, licked my hand, and then darted towards the kids, barking madly and wagging his tail as if he could fly with it.

I was going to miss that.

But not yet I wasn't. As I watched Orion and Padfoot play together I resolved to not let my unhappiness with life get in the way of my being happy right now. If this was going to be the only time I had with a whole family, then this was going to fucking rock, and that was that.

Of course, it still didn't quite feel like a normal family. Neither Orion nor Sirius knew how to act around each other yet, a problem made worse by the fact that everyone thought Sirius was a dog, physically, emotionally, and genetically. They still played and laughed happily together, though, and I knew that given time we could find a way to make it work. If we had time.

_Damnit, Rya, knock it off!_

It took all of my self control to keep the pessimistic thoughts at bay, but as the day wore on it became easier. After Jess and I ran some errands we ended up spending the afternoon in town shopping at local magic stores (with Padfoot) and eating an early dinner at an outdoor restaurant for magic folk. Everyone came home with some sort of souvenir that night, including Padfoot.

We bought him a collar.

It was Jess' idea, actually. Regardless of whether we were going to legally and formally adopt him, it had become perfectly clear that this shaggy, dopey mutt belonged to Orion and I, and when we passed a pet store among all the other stores, Jess nearly screamed her idea in excitement. We ended up picking a dog tag out that was a gold disc with PADFOOT engraved on it. One of the younger kids thought we should put "Padfoot Northen" on it, but I knew we couldn't. If anyone was taking anyone's name, Orion and I would be taking Sirius'. I would deal with the skepticism, with the disloyalty, with the comments, with the mistrust, if it meant I could call him mine in every way. If I could call him my husband, I would handle anything and everything related to the name "Black."

But that was all beside the point. While Orion and I had the tag made Jess and Tyler took their many children over to the cages to look at all the other animals, and the three of us merely watched in wonder as the machine engraved such an important name to us. As it was finishing, Orion made quite the comment.

"It reminds me of your necklace, Mom. It's the same shape, and the engraving is kind of stylized like yours."

He was right. Sirius now had a doggy duplicate of the necklace Neil had made for me all those years ago. It's amazing how life and irony can sneak up on you like that.

"You're right, Rion," I said in shock. The machine dropped the disk into the bowl for us to pick it up, but it was still far too warm to hold. PADFOOT gleamed up at me. The dog and my feet barked softly and nudged me. "Did I ever tell you where I got my necklace, son?" I asked. He shook his head and poked the tag, hoping it was cool enough. It wasn't. "Your father gave it to me shortly before…we parted."

He looked up at me, and then down at Sirius. "Really?" We both nodded. "You didn't purposely create a similar thing, did you? Because that's disgusting. Matching necklaces? Really?" I laughed, even as I vehemently denied being that disgustingly cute with my soul mate. Orion poked the tag again. It was finally cool enough. He picked it up and bent down to Padfoot's height, holding the tag out for the scruffy mutt to look at. "What do you think, Dad?" he whispered. Sirius barked in pleasure, but Orion didn't move to put the tag on the collar we had bought. "You officially belong to this family after this goes around your neck." He seemed nervous, and it only took me a moment to understand why. He was afraid to make the father thing official, afraid Sirius would leave again. I wrapped my hand around the tag and Orion's hand, kneeling down to just below Padfoot's eye level.

"Orion, I want you to understand something as we do this. He has always belonged to this family, but certain…circumstances prevented him from joining us all these years. Do you follow me so far?" I had to make sure Orion didn't begrudge his father's long absence. Time was too precious, and I didn't want a moment of it to be angry. Rion nodded slowly. "You know what happened that Halloween. Your father has been through more than any human being should ever have to go through, and by all rights he should be dead right now, if not completely insane." I swallowed a rather large lump I had been previously unaware of. Sirius shivered and scooted closer to me. "We are extremely lucky to have him with us at all. Do you understand that?" His response was slower, but again he nodded. His expression was slowly losing its fear. "So, if… if he has to be away from us again…" Tears welled in my eyes, and I had to focus on my resolution to be happy in order to not drown in hopelessness. "If he has to be away again," I started over, "we need to support him and understand that he is away because he has to be." I paused, hoping to let everything sink in a little. "Do you understand?" For several moments Orion didn't move, lost in thought, but after a wait he nodded timidly.

"I'm not positive I understand everything, but I think I do." He handed me the tag to put it on the collar. I smiled.

"That's my boy." I slid the tag around until it clicked into place on the thin chain collar. "Why don't you do the honors?" I said, smiling, and handed the collar to my son. Our son. Smiling, he slid the chain over his father's head. Overcome with enthusiasm, Padfoot ended up licking both of us on the face and racing over to get the Hendersons himself, his new collar and dog tag clanking together happily.

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Late that night, after most of the kids had gone to bed, Padfoot managed to tell me he wanted to go for a run. I asked Rion if he would be okay for a few hours, to which he told me he'd probably be asleep by the time I got back anyway, and I asked Jess if she needed me, and when no one seemed to mind me disappearing for a few hours I left.

Though Jess did make it perfectly clear that if I wasn't back before sunrise she was going to start giving me a curfew. It was a rule she knew she could never enforce, but it jokingly got her point across. She worried about me. She lost sleep over me, a thing she couldn't afford to do with so many children to take care of. So I wasn't allowed to make her worry again without suffering some sort of consequence she had yet to think of.

Padfoot and I were barely five feet off the front porch before I was a puma again, and it felt wonderful. I jumped into the form, as I do when I'm eager to become my wilder self, and it felt like one of those amazing stretch-all stretches you have after a wonderful afternoon nap in the sun. Everything felt loose and lithe and strong and powerful and so _right_. A non-animagus would never understand how normal it feels to be in one's animal form, because they don't understand that it's not just another form, it's the innermost part of you. It _is_ you. And I wanted to _run_.

So for a long while, I did. Sirius ran with me, sometimes following me and sometimes running beside me. When I leapt into the trees and went slightly slower because of it, he went slightly slower with me. It was perfect and beautiful and harmonious, and I was perfectly alright with the idea of it continuing forever. Just like my necklace, constantly running, in every way together.

After a long while I finally started to catch up on all my pent up energy and I began to slow. Padfoot took this as a sign that he could finally have control of the run and told me—via animal language—that he wanted me to follow him, so I did. Our galloping flight turned into a steady but speedy jog, just below a run, and soon I was recognizing scents that seemed distantly familiar. It was as if I had smelled them in a dream, as it usually is when I first approach a place on paws that I had been to on feet. My nose remembers the area as it knew it in human form, but a human nose is as good as dead to a hunter. Shortly afterward I recognize the cliff face we were running along, and then we were stopping in front of Sirius' cave.

_Why are we here?_ I asked him.

He smirked at me, somehow. _Just picking up a few things. Stay out here._ He dashed into the cave and I sat down, hearing him transform and gather a few noisy things before transforming back and dashing back out of the cave towards me. He had a cloth sack hanging from his mouth. _This way._

I followed him up, and up, and up. I hadn't been aware of any peaks in this area, and I didn't remember seeing any on that crazy hippogriff ride a few nights prior, but it still felt like we were going up. Then again, we were definitely going away too. I had no idea where we were going, and I was starting to get nervous. _Sirius, what is going on?_ I finally asked.

_We're almost there. Don't worry._ He looked like he wanted to lick me to distract me and calm me down, but I probably would have smacked him for it. Cats do not like kisses nearly as much as people do.

And then the air didn't smell as sappy as it had before, and the trees thinned, and suddenly we were in a rather sizable clearing. The sun had set while we ran, so the stars were starting to shine through the clear, darkening blue of the sky. Sirius walked over to a tree and transformed before yanking a blanket out of a hole in the trunk. I looked at him in confusion.

"While you were out running errands with Jess earlier I rode Buckbeak out here." I stared at him in shock. "And I kind of borrowed your wand." So _that's_ where that was when I left!

I finally transformed as well, simply because I wanted to tell him what a scoundrel he was. He said thank you. That terd.

He spread the blanket out and laid on it, rubbing the spot next to him as if trying to coax me to lie by him. It worked. It wasn't long until we were snuggling in darkness, staring up at the stars, quietly enjoying being with each other.

"Do you remember that one night when you showed be where the Sirius star was?" I asked finally, quietly reminiscing.

"Yes," he said. "You said something incredibly corny about me being the brightest star in your sky." I giggled and nodded. "You know that technically makes me the sun, right?" he continued. I laughed harder.

"Shut up, I was stupid with love. Does that make you feel better? You made me stupid," I retorted.

"Are you still in love?" he said after a moment, all serious again.

I looked up at his face for the first time in at least a half hour. "Of course I am, Sirius," I said honestly. "Didn't we have this conversation already?"

"Yes, I just wanted to make sure." He didn't say anything else or explain any further.

"What is this all about, anyway? You're not one to drag a girl all the way out to nowhere to look at stars." I propped myself up on my elbow in order to get a better look at him. He swallowed forcefully and finally looked me in the eye.

"You know I love you, don't you?" he asked me.

"Yes, I do," I responded, humoring him for the moment.

"You know I would do anything for you? Anything to make you happy, to protect you, anything?" he asked. I agreed that yes, I did know that. My curiosity was extra attentive by this point, almost to the point of distraction. I wished I could just listen, without needing to know where he was going. He propped himself up on his elbow, so that he was only just higher than I was. "Rya, you are the only woman I have ever really truly cared about like this. I thought about you all the time when I should have been going insane. You… you are the mother of my child, and the woman of my dreams. I should have done this twelve years ago. Maybe things would have been different if I had, but…" He sat up and went fishing through his pocket.

He pulled out a small black velvet box. My eyes widened at the sight of it before I looked up and him in shock. He was staring at me with that intensity that seemed to burn right through to my soul. "I can't not have you anymore, Rya." He opened the box, and it was as if a star had lit itself on the inner padding. "Will you marry me?"

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AH!

i don't even know how she's going to respond. OMG.

heh, i'll bet you'll review now!


	15. Of Poking and Prodding

Welcome to the numerous people who have added Puma's Pup to their story alerts! There were quite a few of you this time, but unfortunately i suck at life and deleted all the emails telling me who you are. So you should review this chapter so i know your names!

Speaking of reviews, summery internet cookies go to ShadowChild, SeaNymph, LilyxoxoScorpius, anc Cookie-ER for reviewing the last chapter. You guys rock, so i put extra sugar in these cookies just for you! NOMNOM!

The rest of you, well, i must admit i was disappointed. i thought that of all the things that would get you to review, a MARRIAGE PROPOSAL would do the trick. And in over a month only four of you reviewed. Fail, on everyone else's parts.

On with the story!

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My mind went blank in shock as I continued to stare at the glistening stone set within the brightest gold I had ever seen. It was extraordinarily beautiful for such a simple ring; one pure, shining diamond set in a slender gold band not quite wide enough to surround the stone it displayed. Without thinking, my hand reached out towards the ring, and it wasn't until Sirius moved to take the ring out of the box that I remembered what was really going on.

Sirius had just proposed to me. Sirius Black had just _proposed_. To _me_.

Oh my god!

"Sirius…" I finally managed to say. My eyes glanced up at him for a moment before returning to the ring in his hand. I was mesmerized by it. "I can't believe… How did you…? When…? Oh my god, Sirius…" I couldn't make myself form complete sentences, and in fact it wasn't until later that I realized I wasn't making any sense whatsoever. He chuckled, proud of the fact that he surprised my ability to speak out of me.

"I love you so much, Rya. Say yes?" He looked like he was trying to ask, to beg even, but he knew what my answer would be before I did. He knew that once sentences began forming in my head again, I would only need one word, and he knew exactly what word that would be.

"I… wow, Sirius." I was still staring at the ring, trying to focus on words and failing.

"Rya, look at me," Sirius ordered gently. I did as told. "Do you remember what I said to you when I first asked you out?" I didn't respond, because I couldn't remember if I remembered that far back. It was difficult to think about being at Jess's less than an hour ago, let alone something roughly twelve years ago. "I said something about you listening to your heart and letting it decide." He held the ring out to me again. "Marry me?"

This time I only glanced at the ring. "Of course, Sirius, I want to marry you!!" I exclaimed, hugging him so quickly he didn't even have a chance to get his arms around me. His face broke out into an enormous grin at the look on my face.

"Really?" he said excitedly.

"Sirius I've wanted to marry you for years!" I hugged him again and laughed as he squeezed me back. I hadn't notice tears pooling in my eyes, but suddenly I was sniffing them back. He pulled away and looked at me in the way no other man has, then took my left hand and slid the ring on it. I looked down at my hand, and still the ring shone as if a star had come to land on it, the moonlight reflecting in so many directions it was like its own miniature sun. "Oh, Sirius, it's beautiful."

"I know," he responded, and when I looked up I found him staring at me, without a single glance at the ring. I blushed, and he chuckled. "You haven't changed much, Little Puma," he said, his free hand brushing against my cheek.

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" I asked, practically purring despite my human form.

"It's nothing. You are perfect exactly how you are, right now, just like you were perfect when we first met, just like you will be perfect twenty years from now." He kissed me tenderly, and though I responded quite eagerly he kept it gentle and loving. Soon the tender kisses progressed to soft touches, and it wasn't long until all I wore was the necklace and the ring, both of which he gave me; one warm and reflective, the other bright and shining. He lay over me, his new dog-collar chain necklace swinging from his neck, his own name shining from the dog tag attached to it. He was one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen, even with his eyes being slightly more hollow and his face slightly more haunted thanks to the last twelve years.

"I love you, Sirius Black," I whispered to him, my legs wrapping around him and pulling him closer to me.

"I love you too, Future Mrs. Black," he said back to me, his eyes lit with pride and excitement. I smiled at the name, joy blossoming in my chest. His hands were all over me, but it still wasn't enough. Nothing was enough, not until I was completely and totally his.

That problem would be solved soon enough. If I had any say in the matter, I would be a Black before Orion and I returned to the States in two days.

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We made love under the stars in that clearing, and after gazing at the ring for a bit we made our way back to Jess and Tyler's late that night. It was still far from dawn, so no one was missing us yet, but—excited though we were—we were rather tired from our romp in the woods. As we ran I hesitantly asked Sirius how he felt about having the wedding sooner rather than later, and his response was to tell me that Remus had already said he'd be free tomorrow night. He would _love_ to be one of our two required witnesses.

Tomorrow night then. I'm getting married _tomorrow night. _

My best friend back home is going to kill me if she finds out.

For the other witness I suggested Orion, thinking our son would love nothing more than seeing his father promise to take care of his mother no matter what. He, like his father, worried about me and felt as though I needed to be watched over, and I couldn't help but be proud that he had inherited that from such a wonderful man.

Unfortunately, we didn't quite get to the question of who would actually wed us by the time we arrived back at the house, so when I transformed back into my human self we simply let the subject drop. Quietly we climbed up to my room, a room that had quickly and seamlessly become a room for two when Padfoot arrived. As we crawled in bed, my face still set in a lovestruck grin, I began staring at the ring again.

"You know I'm going to have to take this off around the Hendersons, right, Sirius?" I whispered to him in the darkness. He still tended to sleep at the bottom of the bed, though only because it was more comfortable to his dog form than cuddling ever was.

He snuffed at me, which I took to mean I was right but he wasn't happy about it. I smiled and reached one hand down to wrap in his scruff. That's how I fell asleep, with his star-ring still on my finger.

I woke up roughly the same way, as well. Padfoot's head was lolling off the side of the bed, his shoulders awkwardly angled on the edge and his rump pressed against my knees. At some point during the night he had scooted farther up the bed, bringing himself closer to me. Or at least he would be if he wasn't laying like that. His stomach gurgled a bit, hungry before Padfoot was even awake. It was so like him to be hungry first. I smiled and poked him gently, hoping to wake him up slowly.

He didn't move. I poked him again. And again. When he still didn't move I prodded him a bit harder than I should have, causing him to flail as he woke up…and then he practically threw himself off the bed.

"Padfoot!" There was a scrabbling noise on the floor as I tried to maneuver the covers towards where he had rolled off the bed. His head popped over the edge, his jaw clamped tightly shut and his eyes frantically searching the room for what had jabbed him. I tried (and failed) to hold back a chuckle at the panicked look on his face. He had every reason to be afraid of what would abruptly wake him up, but the look on his normally puppyish face _was_ rather comical. "Are you alright?" I managed, only giggling once or twice.

His eyes roved the room again, this time looking confused and slightly more awake. I couldn't help it—the giggles were stronger than my resolve was, and within moments he was on the bed taking his revenge at my laughing at him by licking every inch of my skin he could. As a human I was not a match for him, and it was only by squirming like a fish out of water that I managed to get him off me. He was panting with laughter on the other side of the bed as I held a pillow in front of me in defense.

"That wasn't fair…" I complained, and I could tell he was only laughing harder. I warily got myself out of the bed and was almost out of the room, with Padfoot bounding behind me, when my left hand reached for the doorknob and I saw a star shining on it. I smiled, kissed my mutt on his head, and remorsefully removed the ring from my finger.

Padfoot whined.

"You know they can't see it, Sirius," I said quietly as I turned to place the ring in my bedside drawer. He growled quietly before his entire face lit up with an idea and he dashed towards where I stood. He gently picked my wand up in his mouth and motioned for me to take it. "What?" I asked him, lost as to what he was trying to tell me. He continued barking softly, pointing with his nose first at my wand, then my ring. I knew he wanted me to enchant it, but I had no idea how or why. Finally my frustration won. "Oh, for Merlin's sake," I said, and cast a silencing charm on the door.

Sirius stood before me by the time I looked back at him.

His excitement was obvious as he snatched the ring and put it on my finger. "They can't see it, I know," he said, interrupting me as I opened my mouth to protest. "But just because they can't see it doesn't mean it's not there…" His hand asked for my wand and I readily handed it over.

"What on earth are you doing to my ring, Sirius Black?" I asked suspiciously.

"Nothing you won't like, Future Mrs. Black," he responded smugly before he started waving my wand. He was muttering things, but I was not nearly awake enough to try and understand whatever charm (or charms) he was placing on my ring. "There!" he said finally. He set my wand back on the table, knowing I wouldn't want to carry it down to breakfast. I gave him my "Explain" look and he quickly obliged. "Two charms," he started. "One, which prevents the ring from coming off unless you personally take it off." That _was_ a good idea, I had to admit. "The second prevents anyone from seeing that ring unless they know me as I am now, meaning the only people who will see that ring are those that know my innocence." Well, that was awfully clever too.

"Innocence?" I teased. "You? No wonder I can't see it anymore," I joked, turning to walk back towards the door, his star still on my finger. I only took one step before his hand shot out and pulled me back towards him, crushing me under his lips. I staggered a little as he let me go, and that smug grin reappeared on his face.

He collected me in his arms, gently this time, and kissed my forehead while I tried to calm my racing heart. Even after all those years apart, one passionate kiss was enough to practically give me a seizure.

"I love you, Little Puma," he said softly, his arms wrapped tightly around me.

I wiggled myself as far into his grasp as I could. "I love you too, Sirius," I responded, my words muffled by his chest. He still understood exactly what I was saying, though, and gave me a little squeeze before letting me go.

"Let's go down to breakfast _before_ we shower this time," Sirius suggested, winking. "I was starving after the shower yesterday, and I'm already hungry." He smirked at me before transforming into Padfoot once more and sitting, waiting, at the door. I shook my head at him.

"You are ridiculous," I said, and we left for breakfast.

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we're going to see some old friends next chapter, but it will be july before the next chapter is up, unfortunately.

that is, UNLESS, i get, we'll say, at least six reviews. if not, oh well! june is crazy busy for me...

ps happy beginning of summer!!!


	16. Preparations

SURPRISE!!!

aha it turns out i can stay connected to the world this month, so here you are, a shiny new chapter just for you!!!

actually, this chapter is specifically for k9cat, booklover, shadowchild (this is after harry's third year, and yes, this will unfortunately be canon), wolfy pup, boy of despair, and humanthesaurus. you guys rock.

chapter!

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It was with barely suppressed excitement that I ate breakfast that morning. Orion was still asleep, but Jess was more than suspicious enough to cover for him. She caught the grin that almost escaped my grasp more than once, and Padfoot's unusually hyper state quite obviously mirrored my uncontainable smile. She didn't say anything, though, and instead settled on frowning in confusion and letting it go. I think she was taking it to heart that there was some things she simply did not want to know about, and I was okay with that. She would never have approved of this rushed wedding anyway.

_I'm getting married!!!_

The thought kept interrupting whatever else I was thinking about. I thought about how delicious the scrambled eggs were, and then about my wedding. I thought about Padfoot almost breaking one of Jess' plates, and then about my wedding. I couldn't stop myself, and every time I had to attempt to repress the giant permagrin that threatened to reveal itself.

In order to burn off some of the excess energy in both of us, I told Jess that Padfoot and I were going for a run and asked her to keep Orion around the house until we got back. She, of course, asked why, and in my most motherly tone I told her I needed to speak with him. She seemed to immediately understand, and I couldn't help feeling a little guilty about lying to her. Jess was a good friend of mine, but she was not entirely open-minded unfortunately. So we left in a hurry, me hoping to outrun my guilt and throw myself headlong into the excitement building in my stomach.

I was Puma before I hit Jess' front lawn, Padfoot bounding happily in front of me, practically howling his elation. We wrestled for a moment before I took off in the direction of the forest, him chasing me, laughing loudly.

We ran for a good forty minutes before finally stopping at a pond. The water seemed clean enough, so I stooped to drink. Padfoot had other plans, throwing his whole body into the water and then coming back for me. As a cat, I was _not_ pleased. And I made sure to transform back so I could scold him properly.

He, however, seemed to guess what I would do and didn't even give me a chance to make a sound of anger at him before he too was human and kissing me, all of his emotion thrown into it. My anger immediately disappeared. How could I be angry with him when he was kissing me like that?

"I love you, Rya," he said when we parted.

I sighed happily. "I love you too Sirius." Now that his lips weren't on me I could feel how soaked my clothes were and suddenly realized I was supposed to be scolding him for it. "You got me wet," I said, trying and failing to sound angry.

"Not the first time," he said huskily, but my honestly uncomfortable eyes made him give me pity and he cast a drying charm on me. I hadn't even noticed him grabbing my wand, but then again he had run upstairs shortly before we left.

"I should be upset that you keep stealing my wand," I commented.

"I always give it back. Isn't that the important thing?" Sirius responded, handing it to me. I huffed and snatched it from him, but instead of feeling frightened or intimidated or something in my favor he simply chuckled at me. "You're so beautiful, Little Puma," he said. I blushed, as always. He hugged me, and I welcomed his embrace even though I knew I was supposed to be mad at him still. We stood for a moment, and then we were both turned just enough to admire the ring he had given me.

"So, when should we go find Remus?" Sirius asked me. I had forgotten that we had to involve others in this.

I thought for a moment. "That depends, I suppose. What time are we having the ceremony?"

"Whenever you want," he said simply.

Again, I thought over my answer. It would have to be a time when Jess wouldn't miss us but we could still reasonably get Orion away. We still needed to talk to him too. It also had to be a time when Remus could be out and about. Where was the moon in its cycle now? Maybe planning this in one day wasn't such an awesome idea. "How about around sunset? If I remember right it's almost a new moon, so Remus will be safe, and Orion will still be awake."

"That sounds beautiful," Sirius said sincerely. "Why don't we take our son"—he grinned uncontrollably as he said it—"for a trip to London after lunch, and he and Remus can meet and get all the details at the same time?"

"Brilliant idea, Sirius." I frowned, my thoughts still on planning this thing. "But, who is going to do the actual… you know, _joining_?" I asked, suddenly too nervous about the word "marriage" to actually say it.

He thought for a moment. "We can ask Dumbledore."

"He's still _alive?_" was the first thing that came out of my mouth. As soon as I said it I felt ashamed. Sirius had always loved him, and he was nothing but nice to me. "Oh, Sirius, I'm so sorry…" I started, but he was already laughing at me. He simply pulled me closer to him, forcing me to feel his chest move with each laugh. I cleared my throat as his laughter subsided. "That would be wonderful. How do we contact him?"

"Remus can do it," he said confidently. "It's less suspicious of him to contact the headmaster after being employed there than if random owls started visiting him."

"Sounds good." I kissed him gently, and he very obviously did not want the kiss to end. So I let him continue it. He did, and our run home was postponed by a sudden lack of clothing.

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We got back to Jess' late that morning, having fully satiated ourselves with each other near the pond. As Padfoot and Puma we ran back, only slowing when the house was too close to not prepare for the sudden stop we would both have to go through if we weren't to slam into the siding. It was possibly the most freeing run I had been on since… well, ever, and I was slightly disappointed when I had to change back into my human form.

Orion was waiting at the kitchen table, shifting in his seat as though nervous. The house was unusually quiet, and I could only guess that Jess and Tyler had taken the kids somewhere while we were gone. Padfoot launched himself through the kitchen doorway, thereby alerting Rion of our return, but it was only when he shoved his massive, furry head under the crook of Rion's arm that the glass of juice in Rion's hand went flying across the table. He immediately apologized, nervously looking for a towel or something to clean up, leaving Padfoot sitting alone by his recently vacated chair.

I know mothers are supposed to be fully supportive, caring, and understanding, but it was rather amusing watching Orion scramble. I gave him pity, however, and waved my wand over the mess, making it disappear. "You're not in trouble, Orion," I said, chuckling.

"Really?" he asked nervously.

"Really," I answered, and he visibly relaxed. "I only told Jess to keep you around because I don't have time to go looking for you today. Where are they, anyway?" I asked, referring to the rather difficult to miss family who was hosting us.

Rion shrugged. "Grocery shopping, I think." Those seemed to be magical words, because suddenly Sirius was standing next to his son beaming.

"Sirius you idiot!" I hissed, quickly sending a charm at the kitchen doorway, the same I had used on my guest room recently. "Warn me, please!"

"Sorry, my Little Puma," he said, his face clearly unapologetic as he bent over to kiss my forehead. Rion looked confusedly between us for a moment before I realized that was the first time he had ever heard his father call me Little Puma. I smiled to myself, happy that my son was having this chance to really know his father. Sirius sat down in the chair next to me even though he obviously still had too much energy.

"What's going on?" Orion asked curiously before I had a chance to begin.

I smiled, no longer able to contain my emotions, not in front of the most important things in my life. "Something very important is happening tonight, and"—my smile grew as I thought my next words—"your father and I want you to be there." I was very carefully keeping my left hand under the table at this point, not wanting the surprise to be ruined in any way.

"Sure, what is it?" Orion responded quickly.

I smiled at Sirius, who ecstatically looked at his only son and exclaimed joyfully, "We're getting married!"

Orion looked at us in shock for a moment before finally saying, "Seriously?"

I set my left hand on the table, and Rion's eyes widened when he saw my newest item of jewelry. "We want you to be one of our witnesses, Rion," I said softly, still unable to control my smile. "How does that sound to you?"

He stared at the ring for another moment, shock still settling around him. Then he looked up at both of us, at our beaming faces, and a smile spread across his stunned features. "That sounds awesome!"

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Jess and Tyler got back just as the three of us were finishing eating lunch, each of their children carrying bags of groceries filled to various heights. It was rather adorable, actually, like little ducklings. However, Sirius, Orion, and I had quite a lot to do in the afternoon before dinner, so we quickly made our goodbyes and headed out. The first stop was Remus', and I was unexpectedly excited to see the bookish werewolf again. One Apparation and a block of walking later found Orion, Padfoot, and I standing at the door of a rather shabby flat. The paint was pealing off the door and the windows looked broken. A touch of anger at society flared within me, but I suppressed it while knocking on the door.

I heard footsteps, and when the door opened I hardly recognized the man who stood in the entryway. His face was far more lined than it had been since I had seen him last, as if every moment of grief in his tragic life had etched its own personal line where everyone could see it. His hair had streaks of grey, rather prematurely I thought, but they made him look dignified rather than old. His posture was weary, and it looked like he hadn't laughed in months. This couldn't be the Remus Lupin who laughed and lived with Sirius Black and James Potter, could it?

"Can I help you?" he said, rubbing his eyes quickly. There was no mistake: I would recognize that voice forever, no matter how sad it became. Sirius whined, causing Remus to look at him.

"Padfoot?" Remus said, shocked.

"Remus?" I asked, still amazed at how different he looked.

"Who…?" His eyes narrowed, as if he finally recognized me. He glanced down at Padfoot, before his eyes, widening, made their way back to mine. "Rya?" he asked. I nodded. "You look wonderful! Come in, please!"

The three of us were ushered into Remus' shabby little flat, and before anything else happened I cast my concealing charm on the walls and Sirius himself introduced the last true Marauder to his son. Orion was obviously overwhelmed, but seemed to take an immediate liking to the man who knew his father so well. After catching up a bit (though there wasn't much to catch up on now that Sirius and Remus were communicating again) we sat down with tea and tried to mash out details for tonight. Sirius and I were going to buy Remus shiny new robes for the occasion, whether he liked it or not, and the only thing he could do to repay us was to get Dumbledore to come and perform the ceremony. He, Orion, and Sirius were all going to wear new things, and though I hadn't even thought about it, Sirius insisted that I go buy a white dress with his funds. I really didn't see the point, but it seemed very important to him so I didn't argue for long. Especially once Orion butted in and agreed with his father, I knew it would be pointless to say no.

The four of us left for Diagon Alley to buy our things, but I split off from the boys so that we could get everything done faster. Remus was in charge of the purchasing of their clothes, and Padfoot and Rion were in charge of making sure Remus bought his with Sirius' and my money. It took a good three hours for us to finish our shopping, and while I arrived back at the Leaky Cauldron with only my dress and accessories, but Remus, Orion, and Padfoot arrived carrying far more than clothes, with even Padfoot carrying in his mouth a bag or two.

"What is all this?" I asked, astonished.

Remus chuckled, and I saw my son smile slyly. "Padfoot thought we ought to get a few other things. Don't worry about it."

"A _few_ other things? You've got…" I counted quickly, "five extra bags, besides what robes you bought!"

"Don't worry about it, Mom," Orion repeated. He took a step closer to me and whispered, "Dad's got it covered."

Hearing him call Sirius 'Dad' was more than enough to make me let go of whatever silly shopping spree they went on, so on that note Remus parted ways with us. He took with him his robes and a few of the mystery bags, but most stayed with us. When I offered to help carry some of them, however, Orion shifted everything in his arms so that he could give me the bag with his and Sirius' robes. My curiosity was disappointed, but I ignored it, knowing I would find out later what all the bags were full of.

We made it back to the Henderson's shortly before dinner, giving Orion and I enough time to come up with a reason for why we were getting dressed up and leaving tonight. We decided we were going to see a play, something random that Jess would not enjoy. Something Muggle. No problem.

And then tonight… well, let's just say most of my dreams would come true tonight…

* * *

wedding soon!

REVEIW PLEASE!!!!


	17. His

whole boxes of popsicles go to k9cat and CateT because they were the ONLY ones to review the last chapter. honestly. i KNOW you guys are reading, i get the story alert and whatnot emails. is it so hard to take ten seconds to tell me to hurry up with the next chapter or something?

no wonder it took me so damn long to write this. and i'll be honest, the main reason i did is because i promised you a chapter a month and july has thus far been chapterless. two reviews is NOT going to be enough to make me think you lot really want this to continue. and there's not much left, anyway...

so for the love of all things rowling, PLEASE review. one word is more than enough.

on with the chapter i don't think i should give you but shall anyway. k9cat and cateT--this one is for you.

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Dinner that evening was what one could call a 'nervous affair.' I was so excited and nervous about the upcoming events that I could barely grip my fork, let alone eat the probably delicious pasta set in front of me. Jess must have asked me what was wrong at least four times, and every time I told her that nothing was _wrong_. I wasn't even lying, which made the thrill of not being honest even stronger. Nothing _was_ wrong: everything, for this one evening, was _right!_ My son was going to watch his mother and father finally be married, I was about to marry the man of my dreams, and we were going to finally be an official family. The only thing I could find about the entire evening that could be "wrong" was the secrecy required, but after being in love with the notorious Sirius Black for twelve years, secrecy has become somewhat of a second nature.

Besides, this was the official end of secrets in my family, and that mattered more to me.

After dinner was over, Orion—with Padfoot following happily—headed up to his room to change for the "play" tonight. Sirius had borrowed my wand to shrink the extra bags and such so that Rion could carry them without the Henderson's seeing them. I excused myself to my own room, also preparing for the "play." After five or six failed attempts at doing my hair by hand, I made my way to Rion's room and demanded my wand back. After a minute or two—in which I assumed Sirius was shrinking the bags—Orion's hand shot out the smallest possible crack in the door, my wand held out. After that it only took three attempts to find a suitable up-do for the occasion. Make-up went on after that, and then, excitement mounting, I unzipped the bag holding my dress. I couldn't help but feel lucky for finding this dress, especially because it seemed so perfect for this wedding. The white fabric of the dress was charmed against rips, tears, and the like, as well as dirt and "natural debris." The fabric was also charmed to reflect light just a little, so that as the sun set on our wedding I would reflect its colored rays a bit. It only reached just below my knees—which was perfect for a wedding in the woods—and the bottom edge tapered downwards towards my right calf. The waist of the dress was accented by a slender, silken sash-like thing that looped over itself on my right hip before mingling with the extra folds of fabric in the long part of the skirt. It was an off-shoulder dress with a bit of a dip at the sternum, but it was also charmed to not slip down in any way, shape, or form.

As I used my wand to zip myself into the most perfect forest-wedding dress I had ever seen, I couldn't help but smile at my own thoughts: _I love magic._

Because I had been raised Muggle, I didn't even try to stop myself from pulling my calf-length, button-up black coat on. In the Muggle world it was bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding, and being a witch only taught me that luck was real. If I could help it, Sirius would not see me until the ceremony. I opened the door to my room just in time to stop Orion from knocking, Padfoot panting happily at his feet. At the sight of my covering coat, Padfoot made an odd sort of confused, disappointed face.

I smiled at him before turning towards our son. He could stay confused for a bit. Orion, however, looked absolutely uncomfortable in the suit we had bought for him. It was the first time he had ever worn one, and he looked terrified to move. He also looked extraordinarily grown up, which brought unwanted tears to my eyes.

"Rion, you look like a young man in that suit," I said comfortingly. He smiled awkwardly before gently tugging at it again. "Is it too small or something?" I asked, concerned that he was physically, rather that psychologically, uncomfortable.

He shook his head. "No, it's not that….it's just… weird. It's not too tight, but it's not as loose as my normal clothing. It's weird." He looked pleadingly up at me, as if I would tell him to change into jeans.

"You'll get used to it, I'm sure," I said, smirking, before I led my annoyed son and leaping doggish fiancée down the stairs. "Jess, we are heading out!" I yelled towards the hallway.

"Have fun!" she yelled back, and I took that as our cue to sneak out before anyone saw Rion's suit and began wondering why he needed to be so fancy for a play. As the door shut behind Orion, he informed me that Remus owled saying he was going to meet us at the Leaky Cauldron with Dumbledore because they did not know where the Henderson's house was and did not want to risk "unwanted attention, considering the groom." I smiled as Dumbledore's voice broke through the message, and listened as Rion continued with the thrilling tale of Sirius's response telling them that if Dumbledore couldn't get them here they ought to not come, considering I would have to Apparate a dog and a twelve-year old at the same time if we were to meet there. Needless to say, we were to meet them at a specific stream Sirius had given directions to, and thus Padfoot led our small little family into the woods.

"Are you nervous?" Rion whispered to me as we walked through the woods behind Sirius.

I smiled, joy at the occasion overriding all other emotions. "Not at all," I said. I looked down at him, that love-struck grin on my face, and then I noticed the small backpack hanging from Orion's shoulder and remembered the extra bags and boxes Sirius had bought. "Maybe a little," I amended, "but only because your father is a trickster and you lot won't tell me what the extra boxes and such were for."

"Aw, c'mon Mom, you know I wouldn't let him prank you during _this_," Orion complained, smiling. "Give me _some_ credit."

"I would if I didn't know you like I do," I replied. "But I suppose I'll just have to trust you this time."

We were silent for a bit longer before Orion said, "I don't think Remus would let Dad prank you during this."

I wrapped my arm around my son, glad he was finally aware of this part of my life. "You know, I think you're right." My thoughts wandered a bit. "Is your father nervous?" I whispered to Orion, aware that the mutt could hear far better in his current form.

Orion laughed. "If by 'nervous' you mean so excited he was bouncing off the walls of my room, then yes. _Extremely_." I laughed as well, the image in my head one worth keeping.

"Oi!" Sirius' voice broke through our conversation. "Pay attention, you two, this way," he said, steering my body back towards the sound of a stream to our left. "Moony and Dumbledore aren't there yet, but they shouldn't be too long." His arm stayed around my waist even though I was walking in the proper direction.

"Moony?" Orion asked.

We both hesitated a little and glanced at each other. "It's a nickname for Remus, sweetie," I said, trying to brush it off.

"Did he moon someone once or something?" Orion asked, still confused.

Sirius burst into that beautiful, barking laughter of his. "Not quite, but I'm sure you'll figure it out eventually. Don't worry about it, son."

Two pops erupted in front of us. "Ah, they've arrived." Sirius darted forward, pulling me along by a hand I hadn't realized he was holding. As I glanced behind me, Orion was shaking his head and darting through the underbrush to keep up, and smile on his face—Sirius' smile. It was still a shock to see it on him.

As the level of noise from the stream rose, the worn out man I had come to recognize as Remus Lupin came into view standing next to an older man with long silver hair and a beard just as long tucked into his belt. Both turned at our approach, smiles lighting up previously wary faces.

"Ah, Mr. Black, Miss Northen," Dumbledore greeted. His eyes twinkled, and even though I was a woman in her thirties I still blushed. "It is good to see you again," he said, nodding to me. "And who might this young man be?" he added as Orion stepped out of the bushes behind us. He halted in shock at the sight of Dumbledore, but Sirius simply pulled his gaping son closer and made the introductions. "Pleasure to meet you, young Mr. Northen." Dumbledore leaned in towards Orion as Sirius man-hugged Remus in greeting and added, "You look much like your father did when he was your age." Orion simply continued gaping in response.

Everyone finished their greetings and left us all in a moment of awkward excitement before Dumbledore spoke up again. "Is this the location intended for the ceremony, or did we have another in mind?"

Sirius immediately grabbed my hand and began pulling me back into the woods. "It's not far from here," he told the small wedding party. We followed the stream downriver a bit, watching as it widened. The sun was finally nearing the horizon. Suddenly Sirius whipped me around to face the river, a large tree standing between the rapidly flowing water and myself. "Think, Little Puma," he whispered to me. He looked up into the tree, causing my ever-curious gaze to follow him. "You may not have been human, but you have been here before." His eyes and body turned towards the rather large, rocky area beside us that led to the stream, and it was there that I noticed irregular circles of paw prints just barely still visible in the dirt. My eyes flashed up into the tree once more, to a specific branch just wide enough for a terrified puma to perch…

"Is this…?" I asked, awed that he had found it. He simply nodded, wrapping his arms around my waist.

"I wanted you to know that I will be with you no matter what happens," he said, kissing my cheek. "Even if you do something silly like run from me." We both smiled.

"Well, Sirius, I'm not running anymore," I replied, twisting in his arms to face him. We kissed gently and quickly before sounds of branches snapping alerted us to the arrival of Orion, Remus, and Dumbledore. We were standing apart, holding hands beside the tree when they emerged from the underbrush. I was grinning like an idiot.

"Ah, is this the place then?" Dumbledore asked.

"Sure is," Sirius answered. They looked around, each nodding in approval.

"Not a bad spot, Padfoot," Remus commented. His eyes darted past us for a moment, catching the slightly orange glow of the pre-sunset rays. "We should get everything set up; the sun's about to set," he added, and with that Sirius kissed me and dashed over to Orion, taking the already presented bag from him.

"Moony, this one's for you," he said, passing over a small box. "This one too," he added, passing another. "Orion…" Sirius smiled, that giant mischievous smile I had always feared a little, and then whispered in our son's ear. I was suddenly much more nervous. Three boxes went into Orion's hands during the whispered conversation and then, voice rising slowly, Sirius hung a camera around Rion's neck. The bag was then tossed to the ground a few feet away, one last box in Sirius' large, warm hand. He walked over to me, smiling, and I had to stop myself from instinctively stepping back until I knew what he was giving me. Instead I let him get close enough to kiss me, and he did not back away. "I know you're already wearing some, but… I got you these earrings for tonight," he said, opening the box that only looked shrunk and revealing a pair of beautiful, swirling, heart-shaped earrings. They went much better with my dress than the pair I was wearing, but even if they hadn't the fact that Sirius was giving them to me made them infinitely better for the occasion.

I paused before reaching for the earrings. "Thank you so much, Sirius," I whispered, looking straight into those beautiful dark eyes of his. He smiled and dropped both of our gazes to the earrings in his hand again. "They're beautiful," I muttered, finally forcing myself to reach for them.

"Not much compared to you, Little Puma," he said as the second earring slid into my lobe. I glanced up, blushing, to find him staring at me again, but before I could chastise him Dumbledore was clearing his throat in a hurry-up sort of way.

Orion came up to us. "Come on, Mom," he said, prying me away from Sirius. "We have to get you ready."

"I am so ready," I responded, unable to take my eyes off of Sirius. He smiled and turned towards Remus and Dumbledore.

"Mom!" Rion said sternly, forcing me to look at him. "Focus. You're still wearing your coat, and I am supposed to give you a few things before allowing you to walk down the aisle." He was steadily leading me directly away from the other males.

"Aisle?" I asked, and one glance backwards showed Dumbledore's wand carving a gentle but smooth dirt path through the small clearing next to the river. That would be one of the many plans Sirius would not tell me. I followed Orion a few feet further before he stopped me.

"All three of these need to be enlarged again," Rion said, holding one in his open palm and the other two behind his back so I could only do one at a time. Pulling my wand out of my jacket sleeve, I performed the spell and found a rather large but flat box in my son's grip. "Go on and open it," he said, and the box opened to reveal a simple wedding veil. The veil was one of the things I had decided to skip on for this wedding, but if Sirius wanted it I was more than willing to play along. I magically readjusted my hair and placed the veil on my head. Orion was smiling as the second box was held out to me. This one grew almost into a cube, and when I opened it a large bouquet of flowers was revealed, the smell of the lilacs washing over me as I lifted the bouquet out of the box. Yet another thing I had skipped on and Sirius clearly wanted me to have.

The last box Orion prevented me from opening once it was enlarged. "Dad says this one is just for you, so I have to leave before you open it." He hesitated. "I'm really happy about for you and Dad, Mom," he said, scuffing his food in the dirt. I smiled, but before I could reply he said "Good luck!" and dashed away.

Curiosity keeping me from waiting longer than necessary, I turned away from the boys and opened the box. A small, lilac-tinted, lace garter sat in the overly large box. I grinned. This may be our wedding, but it was still the wedding of Sirius Black. Thinking quickly, I removed my coat and magically made it float behind me, creating something like a wall behind me. The box was left, empty, on the ground beside its fellows as I turned back towards the boys. My bouquet was already in hand, though I had to hold it with both in order to prevent it from shaking. I wished, once, that I could have a real wedding, but I was so happy to be marrying my Sirius that it didn't matter. Orion came back to me.

"You ready, Mom?" he asked. Dumbledore was standing about twenty-five feet directly in front of me, Sirius in front of him and to the side, Remus standing off to Sirius' side.

Impulsively, I hugged my only son. "I've been ready for this for years, Orion," I whispered to him.

Grinning, he pulled my veil over my face before nodding to Dumbledore, who raised his wand and performed a sort of conducting spell. Suddenly the wedding march filled our little clearing, and I shook my head at the lengths Sirius was going to. Orion's hand gripped the collar of my coat, and a moment later it fell away from in front of me, revealing me in my full bridal state for the first time. Even from twenty-some feet away I could still see Sirius' jaw hanging open. I blushed. Orion offered his arm to me, and then I walked down a makeshift aisle in the middle of a forest on the arm of my only son.

Sirius was still gaping like a fish when I reached them, so before Dumbledore could get going I reached over and tapped his chin. His jaw snapped shut. The wedding march was winding to a close. "You look…" Sirius started, and I blushed even hotter. "Rya," he started again, raising my chin so I had to look at him. "You look so amazing that beautiful is not a strong enough word." The music faded out, and I never stopped grinning.

It was Dumbledore's voice that brought me (slightly) back to reality. "We gather here today to celebrate the union of two faithful souls, two whom have had to endure far more separation than should be possible for a pair as magnetically pulled together as these two." Even as he said it I could feel our bodies pulling closer to each other, yearning for proximity at the very least. "Every person on this earth has a story, but it is not often one hears the tale of the Cat and Dog finding life in the other, despite living worlds apart." The sun was setting, and I could see gold in Sirius' perfect, messy, beautiful, dark hair. He was smiling too as he, without looking, accepted a box from Remus.

"Do you, Rya Northen, take Sirius Black to be your husband, no matter what odds run against you?" Dumbledore asked, and though there must have been hundreds of other possible answers, I could only think of one.

"Yes," I answered, my voice sounding euphoric and my eyes leaving his for the first time in order to inspect the cool ring he was placing on my finger. He paused a moment before sliding it all the way on, making sure I was watching when the simple silver band instantaneously melded with the silver band from my engagement ring. The star that was the gem of the ring slid into the middle of the two bands, there being cradled by an indent made specifically for it.

"And do you, Sirius Black, take Rya Northen to be your wife, no matter what odds run against you?" My gaze met his again, and his eyes held a sort of happy contentment I hadn't seen in years. Orion's hand slid briefly into mine, and I found myself holding a hefty silver band.

"Of course," he said, and I slid the ring onto his left hand, loving the way the ring let out a small shot of light once fully on. Our gazes locked again, and I felt my smile grow.

Dumbledore raised his wand. "Then I declare you bonded for life."

In one swirling movement golden stars rained down upon us, wrapping themselves around our entwined hands, and in that moment I neither saw nor thought of anything but the forever infamous Sirius Black, his eyes lit with golden stars and his hair reflecting the maroon of the setting sun. I had never seen such a beautiful Gryffindor.

Little did I know that all he saw was the quietly strong Rya Northen, eyes glowing in the golden light and body reflecting the dark red radiance of the setting sun rather like a dark angel. I was his dark angel, but more importantly, as the stars melted warmly into our skin, I was his.

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	18. The End

this is the end, folks! this is for shadowchild and peaceless and humanthesaurus. you lot are the only ones that reviewed last chapter, so this is for you.

there will be no more Rya stories after this. fyi. i hope you've enjoyed the ride as much as i have!

though, if you cry easily, you might want some kleenexes nearby. just in case, you know.

thanks to those who've reviewed!

"THE END"

* * *

I never quite understood how it came to be called a "honeymoon." The moon doesn't necessarily have any involvement whatsoever, and honey only relates as an affectionate nickname between people. I never understood the name, but I certainly was not going to take the time to figure it out while laying on a down mattress in Sirius' cave with his fingers inching their way up my legs. Remus had already walked Orion back to the Henderson's and helped him sneak in, while Dumbledore had offered to return the clearing to its original disarrayed state. Now it was just Sirius and I, an entire evening devoted specifically to us, the only honeymoon I would ever have.

Our shoes had been discarded at the door, my veil and his suit-coat following shortly afterwards. His tie had vanished, and his shirt was already unbuttoned, revealing muscles that looked as if they had once been wondrous (and they had!) but were now slightly shrunken due to disuse. His fingers found the garter I had worn just for him, and he stopped kissing my neck in order to smile at me.

"You wore it," he stated, still smiling. His fingers were no longer moving up my leg, but twirling themselves around the lace of the garter.

"Of course I did," I responded shortly, wanting him to kiss me again. "You obviously wanted me to." He chuckled and scooted away from me on the bed. I propped myself up on my elbows to see what he was doing.

"I always wanted to do this to my wife," he stated as explanation before lifting the hem of my dress just above the garter. Slowly, his eyes never leaving mine, he leaned down and gripped the lace with his teeth. Then, still moving with annoying slowness, he gently tugged the garter off my leg. He tossed it into the shadows with his head, and I couldn't help but giggle.

"You are ridiculous sometimes, Sirius Black," I told him.

"Only for you, Mrs. Black," he responded, sending thrills down my spine. Unable to come up with a well-worded response, I grabbed his head and pulled him back towards me in a kiss. His hand drifted up my dress again, and it was mere minutes before our clothes were forgotten a few feet from the bed.

They weren't touched again until the sun's rays began feeling their way onto the horizon, and if there hadn't been an entire family expecting me they wouldn't have been touched then. Still, Jess probably thought I had gotten home hours ago, and maintaining the charade was important. We dragged (most of) our clothes back on and shifted into Padfoot and Puma, running back to the house and a nice, long nap.

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We managed to get back into the house before anyone noticed and spent the remainder of the morning curled up in bed together. I convinced Sirius to don his canine form, just in case, but could not stop myself from cuddling with him regardless of his fur. He, for one, did not complain other than grumbling about how unmanly it is to be the little spoon. I fell back asleep with a smile on my face.

Jess, unfortunately, did wake us up around noon. Orion and I had a train to catch just after dinner, and Jess was kind enough to notice I had not packed a single thing. The soaring happiness I had felt earlier immediately vanished, and without a word I began to gather my clothes. Jess left, having noticed my change in mood and wanting to let me adjust on my own. Padfoot stayed on the bed, but whined to show he had noticed the shift as well.

"I'm…" I tried to say I was fine. I was. Really. A heart cannot break if it has already been broken. The cracks from the last break—caused by him—were still obvious on this heart. How could it possibly break more?

And yet it was.

"Come with us, Sirius," I blurted, wheeling to face him. He stood and leapt softly off the bed, transforming back into a human as he reached for my wand. He cast the silencing charm I should have before ever muttering his name, and then hugged me. I was crying. When did I start crying?

"I love you, Rya Black," he said. I sobbed. I loved hearing my name mixed with his, but I hated more hearing him avoid answering my question. He simply stood there, holding me, his arms tight around my miserable body. Finally he spoke again. "Do you remember Harry, Rya? James' boy?" he asked softly.

I finally got a hold on my emotions to answer. I had a feeling I knew where this was going, and it was not a place I wanted to be. "Of course. He's the Boy Who Lived." I gave a wet sort of laugh. "He used to poop whenever you held him."

This startled a small laugh out of him as well. It took him less time to continue this time. "He doesn't have anybody, Rya. James and Lily both…" he swallowed, his voice sounding wetter with every word. "He doesn't have any real family. Except me, now."

I sobbed again, unable to stop myself. My earlier guess was becoming more and more accurate.

"He's only thirteen, only a year older than our Orion, with no one to turn to besides me. And he _just_ got me. I love you, Rya, you know I do," I nodded silently, showing him that I did know, "but he is my godson and I can't leave him alone again. He needs family too much. Plus James would skin me for shirking my duties." I could hear the sad smile in his voice, but I couldn't look at him. Not now. "Give me a couple months to make sure he knows I'm there for him no matter what, then I will come to the States."

I froze. I had not expected that.

"Really?" I asked, looking up at him. His eyes shown too, though only one tear had escaped his dark eyes. He smiled sadly again.

"You can come fetch me yourself, my wife."

We spent the hours of the afternoon with Orion out in the woods. We had packed everything with magic, preferring to have as much family time as possible before we went home. I left the task of telling Orion that his father would not be joining us right away to Sirius, but though Rion looked distinctly less happy he seemed to understand. He even asked if he could meet Harry, someday. We decided we would have a great big family reunion after Sirius' name got cleared (whenever that was).

Padfoot came with the Hendersons to show us off, but seemed only capable of sitting and watching his wife and son roll away on the train. I had informed Jess that the shaggy black mutt would not be returning to the States with Rion and I, as well as assuring her that he wouldn't keep coming to her house for food. With the window down and tears on my cheeks, I wanted to echo the mournful howl that followed the exit of the train.

A few months. Harry deserved family just as much as we did. Maybe someday we could all have the same family. We practically did already. I wouldn't mind a second son. Just a couple months, and I could have my husband—it was still amazing to think of him as such—at my side like it should have been all those years ago.

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The "couple of months" were just ending when I received a letter from Sirius telling me that he needed to be in England through to next June. Harry had somehow been entered in some sort of tournament, was way over his head, and Sirius personally feared for his life. Harry had had too many near-death experiences already, and to a dog this smelled too much of a set up. There were too many unanswered questions. I could hardly argue against that. Harry, barely fourteen, would be fighting a couple of seventeen-year-olds as well as whatever magical obstacles thrown in his way. He would need support in this time, and Sirius was pretty much the only person for the job. As he had pointed out to Orion, the two of us had each other: Harry quite literally had no one. For this, I could wait a bit longer. I would have to. I would not be so selfish to make him come when his godson was in potentially mortal danger. Orion and I could survive another year without our man-of-the-house.

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Though Sirius and I continued to correspond throughout the year, it was early July's letter that struck me the most. A student at Hogwarts had been killed by none other than Lord Voldemort before Harry's very eyes. Sirius had been right all along; the tournament was simply a setup to get Harry closer to the evil lord. The poor kid was absolutely lost and distraught. The so-called "dark lord" had risen again, and it was obvious that he meant to finish what he started in the Potter household all those years ago. Sirius definitely couldn't leave Harry now. His life was absolutely in danger. A sense of foreboding came with this letter, but not for Harry. Harry, I sensed, would be the hero that survived impossible odds (especially if his past was anything to go by). And yet I could not shake the feeling of dread, even when reading that Dumbledore, upon hearing what happened to Harry and his fellow student, had decided to restart the Order of the Phoenix. Sirius, obviously, had joined up immediately, even offering his family's old house for a headquarters. If he was going to be in England keeping an eye on Harry anyway, he might as well fight the good fight, right?

This was the first letter that Sirius confided he no longer knew when he would come to us, and he insisted we not visit the UK anymore until we knew it was safe again. He wanted to fight in the war, though he did not say as much, and I could hardly blame him. He hadn't had a chance to avenge his best friend yet, and this would be the perfect opportunity.

He would write when he could, but could not guarantee consistency. Dumbledore had recently taken to keeping Sirius in the house, and too much owl activity would draw attention.

It was several months before I heard from him again. Things were not going well. The Order thought it knew what Voldemort was after, and had their suspicions horribly confirmed when a man named Arthur Weasley (whom Sirius neglected to mention who he actually was) was attacked guarding the thing. The Ministry was refusing to believe Voldemort was back. Harry was having vicious, realistic nightmares, and Dumbledore feared Voldemort was not only getting into Harry's head, but that he would eventually learn how to use that link against Harry. Harry and the other students of Hogwarts were also dealing with supposedly the "worst teacher ever known to studentkind," making the boy's life extra miserable. Sirius was trying to help by encouraging extra-curricular activities, but he couldn't really tell if it was working yet or not.

All and all, things were not going well. I was not to try to visit. It was too dangerous. I began to get déjà vu reading his letters, and the sense of foreboding increased. Something was going to happen. Something bad. And once again, he was not letting me fight.

I suppose at least this time he had a good reason. Orion needed _someone_ to look after him.

That was the last letter I ever received from my husband, Sirius Black.

The next August, after too many months of hearing nothing from him, I sent a letter to the only man I thought could convince Sirius it was time to pick up his quill again: Remus Lupin. We had exchanged a few letters since the wedding, so I knew he would read and at least respond. I begged him to either force Sirius to write to me or to tell me himself what was going on.

In late August, Remus finally got a letter to me. The parchment was crumpled and stained with small spots. His handwriting was shaky, even for him.

Sirius had fallen in a battle at the Ministry of Magic. Enclosed was something Sirius lost during the fight that Remus had found on his way out. He figured I would want it more than he did.

It was a golden dog tag, PADFOOT inscribed in large, stylized letters across its oval surface.

This time the darkness was familiar. I greeted it like an old friend. I knew it would release me eventually, and I knew Orion would be taken care of until then.

Sirius was gone. Not just gone, disappeared, vanished forever, _dead_….

Without Sirius, this darkness was perfect.

* * *

Rya survives, as she always has, but you know she never did move on after him. Perhaps she too died at a young age, once her son was out in the real world taking care of himself, and now not only are brothers reunited, but all three have their loves with them in the afterlife.

One must hope there was a place for them all to be together somewhere.

The End.


End file.
